EDWINA CURRIE ON MEN

Men are people and we all need people. Thats what the so-called 'feminists fail to appreciate. When I was a kid in Liverpool, my parents wanted me to stay home and get married to one man. But that would have been a waste. Fellas need women like me, and I need fellas, especially that fella Jake [Quickenden, 26, a former X Factor singer and one of Edwinas fellow contestants on Im a Celebrity]. Of course, it should be the men who do the Bush Tucker Trials. They were the original hunter-gatherers. Call it an old broads intuition, but I think Jake finds me attractive.

EDWINA CURRIE ONUNDERPANTS

These girls and they are nothing but girls seem to wear a different bikini every day. Look at that Melanie Sykes, or that brainless girl from the Playboy mansion. In my day, we only needed one bikini to attract a man. And the men only needed one good set of underpants to attract a woman. I remember John [Major, a former prime minister] standing in my flat. One big man in his blue underpants.

EDWINA CURRIE ON ONENESS

Whole people need other whole people, and it could be youre a whole man like Jake and you see the whole woman of your dreams, or it could be youre a whole woman thats missing her whole man. Plato argued that we were all one until the gods split us in two, and now all the halves wander the world seeking one another. Love is the longing for the half of ourselves we have lost. Thats what it was like with John. He was the other half that made me whole.

EDWINA CURRIE ON SELF-AWARENESS

The trouble with the silly young girls in this camp is that they have no self-awareness. They dont realise when they are humiliating themselves with the things they say, with the things they do. In my day, we [the recording quality becomes too indistinct to transcribe here] but whereof Kendra cannot speak, thereof Kendra should remain silent.

EDWINA CURRIE ON FLATULENCE

Ive always maintained that it is better out than in. Some of the silly young girls have been complaining that I break wind quite a lot, but I only do it in my own area of the camp, so whats the problem? I think the problem deep down is that Melanie and Kendra feel insecure.

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Zen and the art of Edwina Currie