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2023 Is the Year To Change Your Mindset: You Can Be Rich, Too! – Yahoo Finance

Posted: January 7, 2023 at 12:11 am


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Siddhartha Gautama, better known as the Buddha, is quoted as saying, The mind is everything. What you think, you become.

Its sage advice thats as true with your finances as it is with every other aspect of your life. Whether youre heading into 2023 with specific resolutions or just a general goal of whipping yourself into financial shape, your chances of success are only as healthy as your money mindset.

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Even the loftiest of financial goals are within reach if youre willing to make just a few subtle tweaks to your mental relationship with the almighty dollar. So, do you want to change your life in 2023? Then change your money mindset first heres how.

The most common New Years resolutions deal with fitness and money, and they both share one common trait there is no pill, no app, no gadget and no secret trick that can get you where you want to be if youre not willing to put in the work.

Accept that it wont be easy, said consumer finance expert Kyle Enright, president of Achieve Loans. Its good to have a positive attitude, but its self-defeating to think that changing habits will be easy. If it means sticking to a budget or cutting expenses, chances are that it likely will require some sacrifices. While it doesnt mean you must live in anguish, it usually does require accepting some lifestyle changes, belt-tightening and commitment.

People make resolutions when theyre overfed, overweight and overextended after the mad rush of the holiday season. They often set unrealistic goals based on promises of total financial or physical piety that most people wont and probably shouldnt maintain over the long term. Keep reality and your own nature in mind when you set your financial aspirations for the coming year.

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Keep goals small, said Enright. The goal to eventually cover at least six or nine months of base living expenses can be overwhelming to many people, who then give up on it. Instead, start small even just $10 a week and build gradually.

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If youre serious about reaching your goals, youll start the new year with a budget. Here, too, you should base your mindset on the realities of your income, debt and lifestyle not the image of the person you dream of being at this time next year.

If your goal in the new year is to stick to a budget, ensure that the budget youre creating is realistic, said Jake Hill, CEO of DebtHammer. Too often, people set unrealistic goals for themselves and then are surprised and disappointed when they cant follow through. Instead, create a budget that reflects your income and expenses, including all your fixed and variable costs. Be sure to account for unexpected expenses and emergencies, and ensure that your budget is flexible enough to allow you to have some money left over for fun.

Chad Willardson, a certified financial fiduciary for high-net-worth entrepreneurs and founder of Pacific Capital, believes youre much more likely to achieve your money goals if you race to achieve them with someone who shares them. There are few things more valuable when the going gets tough than a partner to keep you on the straight-and-narrow path when your inspiration wanes.

The number one shortcut to seeing your goals through is having an accountability partner that will hold your feet to the fire, Willardson said. This will always hold true whether its money, business, or health goals.

He recommends two books by Dr. Benjamin Hardy Be Your Future Self Now and Who, Not How which outline why those with accountability partners are more likely to realize their financial resolutions.

Determine who it is that will help you achieve your goals, Willardson said. Most of the time we set goals and start wondering how we can achieve them, which is why we stay stagnant. If we knew how to achieve them, we would have already.

Cody Candee, founder and CEO of Bounce, agrees. Your like-minded friends can help egg you on and become accountability partners, he said.

Saving money with friends makes it somewhat of a less boring and tedious initiative it may help motivate you to follow through on your goal to change your spending habits for the better if you do so alongside people you trust and whose company you enjoy. Think of it like you and your buddies are planning a group vacation. You all come together to clarify financial expectations and make sure everyone keeps to the agreement. You call each other out in the process if someone is slacking. Thats what your friends can do for you and your financial goals this upcoming year as well, said Candee.

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

Heart attack at 46 led to a new heart and new outlook on life – American Heart Association News

Posted: at 12:11 am


Heart attack survivor Eddie Garcia. (Photo courtesy of Buggsy Malone)

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Eddie Garcia juggled roles as the chief of staff for an elected official and the president of a school board. The positions seemed to be wearing him down.

At 46, he felt short of breath, his neck was sore and he had chest pain. Could it be a panic attack, he wondered?

Later that day, a trip to a clinic led to a trip to the emergency room, and then to a diagnosis: One of the main arteries in his heart was 100% blocked. He was having a heart attack.

Doctors inserted a stent to restore blood flow and keep the artery open. In the next 10 days, Garcia returned to the hospital twice because he felt fatigued and easily winded. He was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. In the second of those subsequent hospitalizations, Garcia's heart stopped.

While doctors were able to restore a normal heartbeat, he again endured lingering damage. Fluid had built up in his lungs, preventing his organs from receiving oxygen. He developed a condition called acute respiratory distress syndrome, and it's often fatal.

To give his lungs time to heal, doctors placed Garcia in a medically induced coma. Meanwhile, his family and friends sat vigil in the waiting room, saying prayers and telling stories. There were often 25 people there at a time. "I wasn't conscious, but I think I was able to feel that energy coming through the walls from the waiting room into the ICU," Garcia said.

When he woke up nearly a month later, his muscles had become very weak. Once Garcia was healthy enough, doctors protected him against another cardiac arrest by giving him an implantable cardioverter defibrillator, or ICD. The device monitors the heart's electrical activity; if it detects any dangerous irregularities, it shocks the heart back into a normal rhythm.

Garcia's heart journey began in 2010. For the next seven years, he managed his heart failure with medication and lifestyle changes such as eating a low-sodium diet and taking a daily 1-mile walk.

Then he began having trouble completing that walk. He felt tired and winded. Around the same time, his heart rate became so rapid that it triggered his ICD. This happened twice, once when he was sleeping.

"If you start having more and more of these shocks, then not only is it unpleasant and traumatic, but it's also an indicator of a worsening heart," said Dr. Hemal Parekh, an advanced heart failure and transplant specialist who treated Garcia. "It was time to start thinking about advanced therapies."

Parekh said Garcia's positive attitude and resilience made him a good candidate for a heart transplant, but there was one complication: He had developed pulmonary hypertension, or high blood pressure in the lungs. This could cause a new heart to fail. However, it could be controlled over time.

As Parekh began that process, another surgeon implanted a left ventricular assist device, or LVAD, to essentially do the work Garcia's failing heart could no longer do. Although some people live with an LVAD for years, the device is often used as a temporary bridge to transplant.

Once doctors confirmed that his body could tolerate a new heart, Garcia went on the transplant waiting list. After 17 months, the transplant team called. They had identified what looked like a perfect match. A former high school athlete, basketball coach and lifelong sports fan, Garcia compared it to being in the locker room before a big game. "I was super excited and nervous," he said. "Here we go."

Early the next morning, nurses rolled Garcia into surgery. The next thing he remembers is waking up, groggy and in pain but also breathing more easily than he had in years.

Garcia and his wife, Sandra, returned to their San Jose, California, home early in the COVID-19 pandemic, which meant his legion of friends and family couldn't hug him. So they did the next best thing. They surrounded his house in their cars, beeping their horns, holding up signs and balloons to welcome him home.

"Having this huge system supporting me was magnificent," Garcia said.

As Garcia's physical health improved, his mental health became an issue. He became among the more than 60% of heart transplant recipients to experience anxiety and/or depression during the first year after surgery. Some days he struggled to get out of bed. He agonized over how his inability to work had impacted his family's finances.

"After 10 years of heart failure, I got to the holy land, but I felt like an abject failure," he said. "It was absolutely awful."

With the help of a therapist, his outlook improved. He began looking for ways to raise awareness about heart disease. He spoke at American Heart Association events, for example, and participated in a local Heart Walk with his transplant team.

He also published a book about his experience and subsequent spiritual journey, which centers on faith, hope and love.

Garcia continues to take daily walks, watch his diet and check in regularly with his doctors. Despite those efforts, during the summer of 2021, a test revealed high levels of antibodies in his blood a sign that his immune system was rejecting the new heart.

He spent 11 days in the hospital. An intravenous infusion of immunosuppressants stopped his body from rejecting the new heart.

Now retired, Garcia has come to realize that taking care of himself means taking it easy and knowing when to say no.

In addition, he's embraced mindfulness, focusing on what's happening in the moment rather than obsessively worrying about the future, as he did before his heart attack.

"You've got to take it one day at a time," he said. "When I'm in the groove of living in the moment, it's pretty great."

Stories From the Heart chronicles the inspiring journeys of heart disease and stroke survivors, caregivers and advocates.

If you have questions or comments about this American Heart Association News story, please email [emailprotected].

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Heart attack at 46 led to a new heart and new outlook on life - American Heart Association News

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

How to refresh your home for the New Year | – Homes & Gardens

Posted: at 12:11 am


A New Year allows for a new outlook and that often includes a rethink of our homes. As the Christmas decorations come down, it is the perfect time to consider a refresh of your home for the year ahead.

Whether you are looking to incorporate new interior design trends, or want to shift to a more timeless scheme, there are plenty of easy refreshes you can do that don't require a whole renovation.

Here, designers have shared the 10 ways they revamp their homes in the New Year to make a space feel like new.

A New Year is often a great time to refresh on our interiors, begins the founder of AMC Design (opens in new tab), Ann Marie Cousins. After a busy year and festive season, taking time in January to look at and evaluate our spaces can be done in a number of ways from decluttering and home organization to adding color and life into dcor and home furnishings.

(Image credit: Robert Sanderson)

Refreshing a living room for the New Year doesnt have to mean completely changing the layout of a space. Simply switching up coffee table decor can be enough to refresh the room, and reflect the new interests you want to focus on in the New Year.

Restyling a coffee table is a great way to freshen up a space. These are typically in the center of the room so are often a focal point and immediately draw the eye, advises Jo Maudsley, director at Charlton Brown (opens in new tab). Make sure you have items of different heights perhaps a collection of books, a candle, and some fresh flowers. A good way to keep coffee table styling neat and avoid clutter is to use a tray or a book to compile objects onto, he suggests.

New coffee table books are cheaper than art and can add a lot to a space, adds Samuel Pye, creative manager at Echlin (opens in new tab). Our favorites are below.

Established stylist, art director, photographer and author Hans Blomquist is a master of rustic edges, moody colors, and natural materials.

Athena Calderone's latest book delves into a selection of designer dwellings, exploring how each carefully crafted interior came together.

With a career spanning 30 years, interiors photographer Simon Watson captures the spectacular homes of fascinating people.

(Image credit: Charlton Brown)

Floral trends come and go, but spring flowers never go out of style and can make a post-Christmas space feel fresher instantly.

We would suggest using seasonal flowers so that there is a continuous change in the room, whether they are from your garden, walks, or your local florist; this really transforms the spaces and keeps it feeling fresh, says Jo Maudsley, of Charlton Brown.

(Image credit: Neptune)

Intentionally curating home fragrances adds another dimension to your home decorating, and picking out new scents for the New Year can really help freshen your interiors.

Either changing the scent in your reed diffusers or getting one in the first place can dramatically change the feel of a room, says Samuel Pye, of design studio Echlin. It works particularly well to change these with the seasons, going for woodier and darker scents in the winter and lighter and fresher in the summer.

This is our favorite.

(Image credit: Photography by Adrian Gaut/Styled by Colin King)

Lighting can be easily overlooked once in place, however, your lamps do more than just illuminate your home. Beautiful lighting can help to elevate a space, so adding a new sculptural or statement lamp in place of your old one can do wonders for reinvigorating a room.

A new light, particularly floor lamps and pendant lamps, is like a new pair of shoes and it can lift everything else up around it, Samuel Pye of Echlin muses. This works particularly well if youve not been one to invest too much time or money in lighting before. You wont regret the change it makes.

Just be cautious when leaning into lighting trends always invest in a statement piece that will stand the test of time.

(Image credit: Taran Wilkhu / Angel O'Donnell)

Trying out new paint ideas is an obvious choice when trying to make a home feel different, but it is a go-to option for a reason. Between incorporating new color trends for an up-to-date space and simply adding a new coat to freshen up existing schemes, paint is a truly transformative tool.

If you want to dramatically change the look and feel of a room paint it, says Ed O'Donnell, co-founder of Angel O'Donnell (opens in new tab). Be brave. If your walls are pale, go for a deep ruddy red, inky inchyra blue, or rich moss green, any color thats different from the one you have. Similarly, if your walls are dark, go in the opposite direction. This is all about doing something new, bold, and transformative.

You dont have to repaint a whole room just to make a space feel new, however. Painting smaller sections such as trims and alcoves, or even trying out bold ceiling paint can help to breathe new life into your home.

In an old home, painting your woodwork such as baseboard and any cornice the same color as your walls is a great way to freshen a space, continues Samuel Pye, creative manager at Echlin. To me, it feels more architectural, and it elongates your walls making ceilings feel higher. If its not too long since you decorated, it should not cause an issue blending with your wall color, as there is a natural break line and most DIY stores can match your wall color to a water-based woodwork paint that dries in a couple of hours.

(Image credit: Taran Wilkhu / Angel O'Donnell)

Upcycling is ethical, affordable, and rewarding, says Ed O'Donnell, of Angel O'Donnell. Select a well-loved piece of furniture in your home and give it a new lease of life. If a chair needs reupholstering, try dual fabrics of contrasting colors or materials. Or pick out an arm, seat or side panel in a pattern. This is your opportunity to make a new design statement with an existing piece.

Commissioning upholstery and soft furnishings is the best way to get a professional finish since upholsterers can advise on the best fabrics to use on specific pieces of furniture; you can invest your energies in choosing the best designs.

(Image credit: Patrick Williamson Photography )

The clever deployment of pillows, throws, window treatments, and rugs is the simplest way of revising a home especially if you are decorating a home on a budget.

Clever use of color can be an effective way to freshen up a home. Bold colors are best used on accessories and soft furnishings which can be more easily replaced, swapped, and switched around, giving the home a boost of energy every now and again, says Jo Maudsley, director at Charlton Brown.

Its harder to do this with staple items like sofas, headboards, and expensive pieces, so its best to keep these more subdued, as they will likely remain in place for some time.

Alternatively, rather than investing in new items, think about borrowing accessories from other rooms in the home, swapping around pillows, throws, rugs, and mirrors to give each space a new lease of life.

(Image credit: Surface View)

Understanding how to choose art for your home is important, especially if you are looking for pieces you connect with and have a personal value. Despite this, you may find yourself falling out of love with pieces you originally craved.

If youre lucky enough to have a lot of art lying around, dust it off and arrange it on a wall, suggests Ed O'Donnell, co-founder of Angel O'Donnell. Otherwise, select a few cherished family photos, visit fairs in search of second-hand prints and colorful postcards, and if you have children, frame some of their favorite school paintings. The point is, you dont need an expensive art collection to create a gallery wall and transform the feel of a room.

(Image credit: Taran Wilkhu / Angel O'Donnell)

A shelfgroaning under the weight of lifes detritus old manuals, loose bits of paper, broken widgets can drain a room of energy. So, put aside half a day to shred the paperwork you no longer need, place files into cupboards, and fix anything broken, advises Ed O'Donnell of Angel O'Donnell.

If you find something useful you no longer want, donate it to charity. Decluttering soothes the soul and frees up space for flowers, mementos, pictures, and books. Its life-changing.

Once cleared, styling shelves beautifully can help stop clutter from re-accumulating and undoing your hard work.

(Image credit: Susie Atkinson / Studio Atkinson)

Wallpaper is often overlooked in favor of easier-to-use paint, but a fresh wall pattern can be more than enough to rejuvenate a room. Wallpaper borders saw a new lease of life in the past year, making them ideal for revamping existing wall decor without the effort of stripping and replacing wallpaper panels.

Although people may not already own them, wallpaper borders are a quick and cost-effective way to give a room a lift without having to wallpaper the whole space, says Susie Atkinson, designer and founder of Studio Atkinson (opens in new tab).

Borders are a cost-effective way of refreshing a room without having to go to the lengths of rehanging a whole room with wallpaper. You can really get creative with them. For example, if you want to lift a room you can use borders to create panel frames or even use them on furniture or under the tread of a staircase. There really are no rules!

If your home is in need of a refresh at the beginning of the year, then embarking on whole-home decluttering is a great start. Decluttering your space helps to get rid of unused items, makes space for new belongings (especially important straight after Christmas), and removes pieces you have fallen out of love with. Decluttering in this way will help you start the New Year on the right foot with a positive mental attitude toward your home.

Getting rid of belongings and objects that bring bad memories, or that you have negative associations with is a great place to start when trying to make a home feel happy and positive. Beside this, happy room ideas include introducing fresh, light colors, such as yellow and pale green; texture in natural materials; and techniques such as hanging mirrors to boost light levels.

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How to refresh your home for the New Year | - Homes & Gardens

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

LGBTQ activist found dead inside metal box by side of the road in … – attitude.co.uk

Posted: at 12:11 am


LGBTQ activist Edwin Chiloba has been found dead inside a metal box at a roadside in Kenya.

The fashion designers body was found near the town of Eldoret on Wednesday (4 January 2023), according to reports.

Gay sex is illegal in the African country, and punishable by up to21 years in prison. LGBTQ rights organisations have linked the 20-somethings death to his sexuality.

A rep for the Nairobi-based Galck+ (formally the The Gay and Lesbian Coalition of Kenya) tweeted: Words cannot even explain how we as a community are feeling right now.

Edwin Chiloba was a fighter, fighting relentlessly to change the hearts and minds of society when it came to lgbtq+ lives. Another soul lost due to hate. You will be missed. RIP.

The BBC quotes police spokesperson Resila Onyango as saying: We dont know for now why he was killed that way. Experts are handling the matter.

The Star, a daily Kenyan newspaper, reports that Chilobas relatives have positively identified his body at Moi Referral Hospital. Initial police reports indicate a numberless vehicle was seen dropping the metal box near a river, adds the Nairobi-based publication.

The outlet adds that Chilobas real name is Edwin Kiprotich Kiptoo.

Speaking to the BBC, Chris Makena, an activist friend of Chilobas, said he spread love wherever he went, was bold about his existence as a queer man and encouraged many others to do the same.

Since news of his death emerged, followers have began leaving tributes on Chilobas Instagram posts. One says rest easy, icon while another reads: Rest in eternal peace big man.

A comment from a Delight Technical College rep states: His excellency in his work & skills are irreplaceable & shall always be cherished. The Textile and Fashion Industry will truly miss him.Our heartfelt condolences to his dear ones.

An anonymous tweet on Chilobas Twitter account posted today reads: We call upon the @DCI_Kenya [The Directorate of Criminal Investigations-Kenya] to move with speed and apprehend the perpetrators of this heinous crime. Edwin Chiloba was a decent human being.

The tweet furthermore states: She did not pose any danger to the society. Her death will not be in vain. The LGBTQ society mourns.

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LGBTQ activist found dead inside metal box by side of the road in ... - attitude.co.uk

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

5 Surefire Ways to Look Younger, According to Science, Including … – Eat This, Not That

Posted: at 12:11 am


There is no actual fountain of youth but is there a way to look younger, naturally? Dr. Tomi Mitchell, a Board-Certified Family Physician with Holistic Wellness Strategies says, "In my career as a physician, and one who has had a particular interest in skincare and cosmetic procedures, I have had ample experience seeing how making certain choices can profoundly impact your appearance. It is no secret to me why two people, who are the same age, have one person look much younger than the other. Even though diet, sleep, and exercise have always been seen as the gold standard for staying young and looking fresh, there are a few other tricks to keep your age at bay. Here are a few science backed tips to look much younger than your said age."

Dr. Mitchell reminds us that, "Smoking can have serious consequences on a person's body and organs. It is known to be the leading preventable cause of premature death in the United States and many other countries. The nicotine found in cigarettes can do more than damage the lungs; it can affect all body systems, from cardiovascular to reproductive. Smoking increases a person's chance of developing heart disease, stroke, cancer, and respiratory issues, speeding up the aging process for skin and organs. The free radicals released into the air by smoking also hurt a person's eyesight and could cause blindness or create cataracts. Furthermore, it has been linked to sexual issues such as the inability to become aroused or erectile dysfunction.

Most people know that smoking is bad for your health and can cause early signs of aging. Unfortunately, this knowledge isn't always enough to deter people from taking up the habit. I find it hard to think of any smoker who has been doing it for an extended period without exhibiting some form of premature aging. The reality is that smoking brings various adverse effects on your skin, contributing to fine lines and wrinkles and the overall loss of vibrancy and a youthful glow. This makes it very clear why so many skin care professionals stress the importance of smoking cessation to keep skin looking and feeling its best."

Dr. Mitchell explains, "Taking proper care of your skin is essential to keeping it looking young, healthy, and beautiful. The first and most important way to start protecting your skin from premature aging is always to wear sunscreen with a minimum SPF of 30 outdoors. You should also drink plenty of water, as hydration is key for skin that looks its best. As far as beauty products go, opt for ones formulated with natural ingredients and free of potentially irritating chemicals that can lead to damage over time. Finally, use mild cleansers and consider exfoliating regularly to keep your skin looking brighter and reduce the appearance of wrinkles. Proper care can help you look younger while also improving skin health overall. Additionally, keeping your skin hydrated is super important. Investing in a good moisturizer that suits your skin type can do wonders for keeping it supple and wrinkle-free.

Aging or sun-damaged skin can create havoc in our lives; unfortunately, the neck and hands often get overlooked when taking corrective action. However, the good news is that many easy and effective treatments at home and a medical spa can help improve the look and feel of your skin in those areas. From creams to masks to chemical peels, there are many options available. In the cosmetic world, I often see people investing lots of time and money in their faces but forgetting about their neck area and dcolletage. Taking extra attention to these areas can make you look younger than ever!"

According to Dr. Mitchell, "Revamping your look can do wonders for how younger you feel and appear. First, start by evaluating your wardrobelook at the clothing, styles, and colors of your everyday attire. Changing up a few key pieces can instantly liven up your everyday look. For example, swapping out some muted tones for brighter colors like a cheerful yellow or pretty pink can help refresh your style and give you a more youthful air.

Additionally, modern cuts which flatter the body's form and fit properly play an essential role in making one look younger. To make a bolder change, consider updating your hairstyle as wellgo bold with a shortcut or opt for vibrant highlights to add vibrancy to the eyes. When thoughtfully planned, revamping your look can transition you into appearing more vibrant and feeling more alive!something that never grows old!"

Dr. Mitchell explains, "Smiling is a universal symbol of happiness and youth that is sure to turn heads as you walk down the street, but it can also have a far-reaching impact on your emotional and physical well-being. If you're feeling low or stressed, a sincere smile can help boost your mood by releasing endorphins and other natural relaxants such as oxytocin and dopamine. Smiling has also been proven to strengthen immune system functioning and reduce stress levels in our nervous system. Additionally, regular smiling helps reduce blood pressure and lower cortisol levels, which may lead to better overall physical health. So don't be afraid to smile today you might look and feel younger while doing yourself some good!6254a4d1642c605c54bf1cab17d50f1e

Laughter is said to be the best medicine, and that's true! Not only is laughter a great way to relieve stress, boost your mood, and make yourself approachable, it's been known to have long-term health benefits. For example, studies show that having a good sense of humor can help lessen symptoms of depression or anxiety. It also has anti-aging qualities; laughing often helps keep your skin looking smoother and tighter while increasing blood flow in the body which increases circulation and helps keep you looking younger. In addition, laughing triggers the release of endorphins in the brain, which makes you happier and more energized. So take some time each day to laugh even if it's at yourself as it might be the key to unlocking a healthier future."

Dr. Mitchell says, "Having a positive attitude can make an incredibly positive impact on your life. It can help reduce stress, increase well-being and even have health benefits. It can even help you look younger than you are. Research has shown that people with a positive outlook on life tend to have better overall health, mental clarity, focus, and communication with others. Those who view life through rose-tinted glasses are more likely to make better health decisions, including regular exercise and healthier eating habits in their daily routines. A positive attitude is not just useful for physical health but also for mental well-being. People with a positive attitude tend to cope better with stress and feel happier and more relaxed. So if you want to stay looking young for longer, maintaining a positive attitude may be the key after all, being happy never fails to bring out our true beauty!

One of the best things you can do for yourself is to stay positive; having an expansive outlook on life and not letting stress take precedence is key in keeping everything youthful."

Heather Newgen

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

Why As A Gen-Z I Want You To Talk About Mental Health With Your Kids – HerZindagi

Posted: at 12:11 am


With rising mental health issues among GenZs, I wish parents would try to understand our life more than debate about our lifestyles.

The National Crime Records Bureau report said that India recorded the highest number of student suicides in 2022. There was a 4.5% increase in teen deaths by suicide. The data also pointed out that 864 students out of 10,732 died by suicide due to failure in examination.

Why am I talking about these numbers and this topic? It is because as a GenZ, I feel it is high time that Indian parents wake up and consider various aspects of their teens life.

I think mental health is one of the biggest concerns that we as a country are dealing with today, especially the Gen-Zs. The easily debatable lifestyle, pressure to overachieve, being a teen under societal pressures and constant scrutiny on social media is a lot that we deal with every single day.

Therefore, we spoke to Kavita Yadav, Counselling Psychologist and Parenting Coach. She is the Founder and Director of JiNa.LivingPositively (www.jina.co.in)

Here are some of the prominent reasons behind rising mental health issues among kids, and why I think parents need to understand them.

In October, we saw the Delhi University colleges declaring a 100% cut-off in 11 subjects. By definition, cut-off means to break the flow at a certain point. How can you create a cut-off at 100%? It is literally the full stop at the end of the line.

While the expectation coming from parents is well-intended, It does more harm than good. Can you imagine yourself constantly focusing on scoring 100% to get into a decent college? It is a lot of pressure to put on a student who is also dealing with changes during adolescence.

Kota topped the list of cities with 14 deaths by suicide. In December, three students in Kota died by suicide within 12 hours. One of them was preparing for JEE Main, and the other two were NEET aspirants.

Yadav says that counselling should start before you are thinking of sending your kid away in such a competitive environment. It should not come after students have gone into a shell after dealing with several issues simultaneously.

She added, Such societal and parental pressure simply takes away the joy of being a parent and your relationship with your child, and slowly anxiety starts creeping in making the teen years harder for your children.

With the advent of social media, only Gen-Zs understand the pressure of getting scrutinised 24*7. Everything is documented, and there is also peer pressure to post something good and funny now and then.

And do not get me started on trolls. Faceless people attack anyone and everyone. There is no dearth to the lowest level they can stoop to. Some teens can also be vicious bullies at this stage and do not leave a chance to bring down a person.

We understand that there can be a stark difference between reels and real life, yet we sometimes look for validation on social media. Even if you do not understand why our lives revolve around Instagram, Snapchat or any such platform, you should at least acknowledge the fact that it is important to us and affects us.

Whether it is ordering food, partying or prioritising comfort over anything, parents these days are quick to judge how GenZs lead their life. It is not our fault that we were born at a time when mobile phones and the internet were already there in the world.

It is not our fault that we had access to smartphones, social media and YouTube at such an early stage then your generation. If all this helps us lead a more easy life, then so be it. Who says that life has to be filled with hardships only? Why does an easygoing attitude have to be a bad thing?

Our expert says that teens are exposed to too much too soon in this fast-paced, ever-evolving technology-driven world. We as parents have to shoulder this responsibility of keeping them safe not only physically but also emotionally. The best gift from you to your children will be anxiety-free parenting, if not fully but keeping it to the bare minimum level.

Don't Miss: Support Groups That Are Leading The Way

Yadav says that teenage is the stage of Identity vs. Role-Confusion, as per psychologist Erik Erikson. When all that is most discussed is their easy lifestyle, their carefree attitude, screen time and social media usage.

It starts impacting the development of their brain as it is a work in progress. Is it really easy for these teens? Does it really seem like something that a walk in the park can resolve? This is a pertinent point to ponder.

In June, a report by the World Health Organisation pointed out that one in every three Indians suffered from depression. In 2021, the organisation pointed out that one in six teenagers between 10 and 19 suffered from depression. It also recorded one suicide attempt every three seconds and a youth dying by suicide every 40 seconds.

Don't Miss: Menstrual Disorders Are Linked To Mental Health Issues

Psychologist Yadav says that Woke is a simple word which means being socially aware and socially conscious of important facts and issues. It is a new fancy term to use in parenting, she adds.

However, she added that as parents let us strive to be more sensitive, conscious and mindful of not shoving information into the world of children, which is not required at a particular age.

Calling yourself a woke parent does not mean you tumble a huge bin of information on your kids heads without considering their capacity to take it all in. Kids need to learn a few things by making mistakes and let us do them. We know that you always want everything to be good for us, but even so we would not make a wrong decision, not consciously at least.

The best way would be to have a discussion rather than saying that was how you used to do it. This is our time and not yours. Over the past decades, things have changed a lot.

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Why As A Gen-Z I Want You To Talk About Mental Health With Your Kids - HerZindagi

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

The plight of Bozemans homeless people – KBZK News

Posted: at 12:11 am


Like an increasing number of Bozeman residents, Belinda and Steven Ankney live out of a vehicle.

The couple of 13 years has been living in a trailer parked in a series of spots around Bozeman for two and a half years and has been working to get into a more permanent home that entire time.

I always tell myself this paycheck will be the one, Belinda Ankney said through tears. Its never the one.

Their vehicle doesnt provide everything they need. Frigid temperatures can make life dangerous, and they worry about their vehicle being towed as the number of cars and trailers functioning as homes grows in Bozeman and overtakes some streets.

And people can be cruel to those living on the street. The couple has had their trailer egged and its windows broken. As they stood in the snow and cold speaking to a reporter recently, the windows of their neighbors car had also been smashed.

When Steven ventures out to ask strangers for money, he said, he is often harassed.

We all work. We all try to survive, and I dont deserve to be called names because Im asking for help, he said. Belinda works as a housekeeper at a local hotel. Steven works at a car parts store.

Living out of a trailer or a car in the winter isnt cheap. Many people rely on generators, which can use large amounts of gas, to stay warm.

Its expensive being homeless, Steven said.

Whats more, the couple has three kids, ages 12, 14 and 16.

One potential solution is the Warming Center, a facility run by the Human Resource Development Council (HRDC) and Bozemans only emergency homeless shelter.

But when the Ankneys stopped by the center for showers recently, they said, they saw a guest smoking what they thought was methamphetamine in a bathroom stall. As recovering addicts, they sympathized with the person but said it was tough for us to be around that.

It makes it tougher on people trying to stay sober, Steven said.

The Ankneys plight on the street and in the Warming Center reveals much of what has made life so hard for the homeless and urban campers of Bozeman, and highlights that homelessness is among the most difficult problems facing the city as its population balloons.

According to Montanas Continuum of Care Coalition and a nonprofit organization called Pathways MISI, the rate of homelessness in Bozeman increased by 35% from 2019 to 2021, and the number of people seeking out the Warming Center increased by 47%.

Recent numbers are even more drastic: In December of 2021, an average of 43 people a night utilized the Warming Center. In November 2022 the average was 77, according to Penny Johnson, communications manager for the HRDC. Thats a 79% increase.

That trend is in part connected to Bozemans lack of affordable housing. According to Zillow, the median rent for a one-bedroom apartment in Bozeman is currently $2,049, and the citys rental vacancy rate is consistently under 2%. With the median price of a single-family home in Bozeman hovering near $900,000, the idea of buying a house is an unattainable pipedream for many.

Jasper, who fears backlash and asked that his real name not be used for this story, lives out of his RV in an urban encampment on Flora Lane, just west of Murdochs Ranch and Home Supply on North Seventh Avenue. Its a tough way to live, he said.

The attitude against us thats the problem with Bozeman, said Jasper, who said he has been homeless or lived in a vehicle in several cities. People tell me, Go get a job. Im working 60 hours a week.

Jaspers friend, Eric Gritzinger Sr., said his belongings were set on fire while he was staying in Lindley Park on the citys east side. He believes the culprit was someone harassing the homeless community.

Nick Acker, who worked at the Warming Center for five years and has lived in Bozeman since 2009, said theres a gaping discrepancy between what Bozeman says it is and what it actually is.

Its lauded as this idyllic mountain college town, Acker said. Thats far from the reality.

LEGAL PARAMETERS

The removal of homeless people from various Bozeman parks and recreation areas started last summer after the Warming Center expanded its availability to 365 days a year. With a shelter open all year and beds available, the city can now force homeless people to leave public spaces. That authority follows a ruling from the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in a lawsuit homeless people filed against the city of Boise, Idaho.

Bozeman police and the city attorney appear to be interpreting the decision at face value.

As long as theres a shelter space we can remove them from the park, Bozeman Police Capt. Joseph Swanson told Montana Free Press.

Over the course of the summer, the city conducted three sweeps of encampments one at Bozeman Pond and one at the East Gallatin Recreation Area, followed by another at the recreation area later in the summer. City parks were also checked weekly following the first sweep by a community resource officer and a member of HRDC, said Bozeman Assistant City Attorney Anna Saverud. Homeless people were warned that if they didnt leave within a few days, authorities would remove their belongings, Saverud and Swanson said.

Gritzinger did not comply in time and said his Lindley Park campsite and belongings were put in a dumpster. (Saverud said everyones belongings are stored in a downtown facility.)

Those sweeps changed Bozemans homeless landscape.

Before a couple months ago it seemed like everyone was piled everywhere in the parks, Gritzinger said.

As Bozemans housing crisis grows, it appears to be manifesting as people living out of their vehicles, rows and rows of cars and RVs parked along numerous city streets.

Theres more vans on the streets than ever before, Acker said.

LIMITED OPTIONS

One of the few alternatives to the street is the Warming Center.

The Warming Center is open from 7 p.m. to 9 a.m. and 12 p.m. to 4 p.m., with Friday and Saturday being overnight-only. But in a couple months, these hours could look different, depending on funding.

Last year was the first year the center was open through the summer, which cost nearly an additional $242,000. Gallatin County contributed $50,000, and $75,000 came from the COVID-19 CARES Act. The rest is from the citys community housing fund.

But fundraising is constant for the center. The city has pledged money for the 2023 summer, but not enough to keep it open the whole season, said Brian Guyer, director of housing for HRDC. HRDC is still working on securing donations to keep the facility open through this winter, he added.

Bozemans former Warming Center on Industrial Drive, which operated from 2012 to 2020, held only 40 guests. The current one, housed in an old roller skating rink at 2015 Wheat Dr., can hold about 100 guests and 120 in a pinch, Guyer said. During the winter, the center will house 80 to 90 guests who are never charged for their stay on a normal night.

The center typically has one staff person working for every 50 guests. At night, during the intense part of the shift, there will be three to four staffers on duty, Guyer said.

But those ratios often dont keep altercations and arguments from boiling over, multiple guests of the center told MTFP.

The whole week theres been nonstop fights, Ame Michel-Barbeier said in late October, around the time temperatures started to drop and Bozeman saw its first dump of snow. Im not getting much sleep.

Nearly every homeless person or urban camper interviewed told MTFP that the center is the scene of frequent verbal and physical fights, but most acknowledged that its the only shelter available to them.

People are getting beat to shit in the Warming Center, said Dawn Campbell, who works at a Super 8 hotel, has been homeless for 14 years and has witnessed a number of fights. But I think that the Warming Center really helps people out.

Guyer denied those characterizations.

Behavior maintenance isnt a huge issue for us, he said. Calling this chaotic would be a gross misrepresentation of whats happening here.

Some of the incidents are par for the course at homeless shelters, especially as an emergency shelter that doesnt require guests to be sober in a county with large gaps in mental health services, Guyer said.

All of this adds up to situations that may seem chaotic, but our staff is trained in crisis de-escalation and addressing tensions before a crisis occurs, Guyer added in an email. Unfortunately, there are times when we have to ask someone to leave due to their behavior and inability to follow our behavior agreement, which is reviewed and signed by every guest.

During Ackers time at the shelter from 2014 to 2019, he said, he saw both aggressive and violent behavior.

If someone says they feel unsafe, thats the reality, Acker said. We could have a perfectly peaceful shelter, and, if a quarter of the people say they feel unsafe, you cant ignore that.

That said, many of the homeless people using the shelter believe that the center staff are doing the best they can.

Im just happy to have a place to sleep, said 43-year-old Nick Faulkner, who came to Bozeman last spring and has stayed at the center almost every night since. [Staff] can only do so much.

CALLS TO POLICE

From Jan. 3, 2021, to Oct. 9, 2022, there were 842 calls to 911 from the center more than one a day, according to city call logs reviewed by MTFP.

Weve seen an increase in calls over there because weve seen an increase of people utilizing the center, Police Capt. Swanson said.

Not all of the calls, however, were for violence or arguments. Many were for medical issues. But because of how the calls are logged, its difficult to glean what happened in each incident, Swanson said.

What can be known is that during that same time, there were 64 calls to the centers address related to incidents including sexual crimes, assault, possession of weapons, criminal trespassing and disorderly conduct that were substantial enough for city police to open a case.

You take addiction issues, you take mental health issues, take the stress of living on the streets and you have a very tense environment, Acker said. Im not saying that excuses certain behavior.

Numerous other calls were reported but often resulted in warnings with no formal case being filed, according to city records.

The cops ought to just park their cars here, said Christie Banderob, a long-time Warming Center guest who now lives in a tiny home village next to the center. Same thing with the ambulance.

THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY SAFE ZONE

Some issues from the Warming Center also spill over into the HRDC-run tiny homes 150-to-300-square-foot homes with a kitchenette and a bathroom where tenants are required to pay 30% of their income toward rent directly next to the center, Banderob said.

After decades of homelessness, Banderob finally got a roof over her head when she was placed in one of the HRDC-controlled homes. But the relief didnt last long for the 59-year-old disabled single woman.

Banderob was falling asleep in her home in late October when a man started banging on her door. When Banderob cracked the door to see what the commotion was about, he pushed his way in and choked, beat and sexually assaulted her, according to charging documents filed against the accused assailant and what Banderob told MTFP.

It only stopped when Banderob managed to get her foot in the cracked door and open it enough to yell for help, she said. The police came and arrested the man, but she had already suffered a broken finger, four broken ribs, and a forehead gash that required six stitches. The assailant, Banderob told MTFP, smeared butter and sprayed Lysol in her hair.

When officers entered her home, they found butter all over the kitchen floor, blood in the entryway which remains on her carpet today and Banderob sitting on her bed, struggling to breathe with blood on her head and face, according to charging documents.

From her hospital bed on the night of the incident, Banderob told officers she thought the man was going to kill her.

This was supposed to be my safe zone. Im 100 pounds soaking wet, she told MTFP.

Banderob said she no longer feels safe in her home and believes the incident was preventable because, according to the affidavit, the assailant was loudly going from door to door before he reached her.

I like having a roof over my head, but all of the time I was homeless I never had any of this shit happen, she said.

The accused assailant, William Perez, has been charged with two felony counts of aggravated burglary and pleaded not guilty. He is being held in the Gallatin County jail on $100,000 bail.

HRDCs Guyer told MTFP that following the assault additional cameras were installed by the tiny homes and patrols by center staff were increased.

Guyer also said that at community meetings an increased police presence at the village has been brought up, but its something that residents have rebuffed. Banderob, however, said shes been asking for more security for months.

Guyer added that security issues are to be expected.

This is absolutely part and parcel with offering up this kind of housing approach, he said. Youre going to have security issues.

The housing approach Guyer referenced is a housing first model that aims to alleviate chronic homelessness and is based on the idea that once people have stable housing they can then obtain mental health and addiction services.

Now, Banderob is talking about finding somewhere new to live because she struggles to stay in the space where she was brutally assaulted.

I dont want to live here anymore, she said. Theres fights all the time. They cant control it.

There are plans for a new Warming Center on Griffin Drive, which Guyer says will mitigate some of the issues that exist at the current facility.

The new center will have more space, family rooms for people with children, and walls as opposed to curtains to separate the men and the women.

Construction of the new shelter will not start until HRDC hits its fundraising goal of $15 million, said Johnson, the agencys communications manager. So far, HRDC has raised roughly $11.5 million in two years, Johnson added in mid-November. HRDC had a goal of opening the new center by the end of 2023, but its unclear if that will pan out.

The Griffin Drive location will also include the Fork and Spoon (a pay-what-you-can restaurant) and other services offered by HRDC.

Bozeman is also home to Family Promise, a nonprofit that, according to its website, can shelter up to about 18 families at a time at various locations, but requires guests to keep a job or be in school and has a zero tolerance for alcohol and drugs, among other requirements that make it inaccessible for some homeless people or urban campers.

Following large donations, Family Promises annual budget increased from roughly $400,000 to $2.2 million from 2019 to 2022, said Christel Chvilicek, executive director of the local organization. That cash spurred a 600% increase in families served, uncovering a large swath of Bozemans homeless population that wasnt being helped. Still, the facility has an average of 30 families on the waiting list at all times, Chvilicek estimated.

In addition, seven more tiny homes are under construction in the village behind the current Warming Center, an expansion that makes Banderob more nervous about living in the community.

This place is a disaster, she said. But I dont want this place taken away from anybody. We need it.

Where else is anybody gonna go?

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The plight of Bozemans homeless people - KBZK News

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

PREP SPORTS BEST OF 2022: The top 10 moments from a … – Goshen News

Posted: at 12:11 am


The year 2022 was filled with plenty of amazing stories in the local sports scene. Some stood out above the rest, though, according to me, Goshen News sports editor Austin Hough.

Without further ado, here are the top 10 stories from the 2022 local prep sports scene.

1. Area girls swimmers shine at state It was hard to just pick one school for this entry, as three shined in their own ways.

Concord took the top billing with its fourth-place finish as a team, its best in school history. Senior Grace Brenneman placed in four events (two third-place showing and two fifth-place finishes), helping her earn the IHSAA Mental Attitude Award selection for the sport. Concord ended up scoring in 10 events, accumulating 162 team points in what was an historic day for the Minutemen program.

While Northridge wasnt as deep of a team as Concord, the Raiders top-end talent was special. It was highlighted by three divers finishing in the top six: Jiselle Miller second, Kaitlin Simmons third and Evie Long sixth. Miller came within five points of winning the state title, taking the lead into the final dive before Center Groves Mia Prusiecki edged her at the end. All three Northridge divers are competing in college currently at Louisville, Purdue and Bowling Green, respectively. Along with swimmer Syd Nethercutts big performances in the 500- and- 200-yard freestyle races, the Raiders finished ninth as a team at state.

Wawasee also had a strong showing at state, placing 12th. Sisters Alexis and Julie Mishler placed in multiple events, allowing the Warriors to have its best finish at the state meet in its program history so far.

2. Fairfield GBB comes within seconds of the state title game Fairfield was the top girls basketball team in the area back at the beginning of the year, coming within moments of making it to its first ever state championship game. The Falcons overcame an injury to senior starter Brooke Sanchez to win sectional and regional championships, advancing to the Class 2A semi-state game. Locked in a defensive battle with Frankton, Fairfield led late in the fourth quarter before Eagles senior Bailee Webb made a shot with 16.9 seconds remaining. The Falcons couldnt muster up a shot on its final possession, ending Fairfields season one game short of state. Despite the bitter ending, the Falcons finished 24-4 on the season, tied for the most wins in a season in program history.

3. Fairfield baseball wins sectional title in honor of Kadin Schrock Probably the most emotional story of the year, Fairfield sophomore baseball player Kadin Schrock died in an accident on May 15. Two days later, the Falcons honored Schrock before a game with their rivals, Westview, in what was a stirring scene in Emma.

Thirteen days later, Fairfield returned to that same field, this time beating the Warriors to win a Class 2A sectional championship, the programs first since 2010. All the players on the Falcons team wore the sleeves rolled up on their jerseys in honor of Schrock that day, and they dedicated their entire season to their teammate who passed away too soon. Although Fairfields season would end in its next game, the 2022 Falcons will always be remembered for how they handled such a tragic event with grace and courage.

4. Alexys Antal pitches Westview softball to its first-ever sectional title Youll be hard pressed to find a better single-day performance than the one Westview senior Alexys Antal had on May 28.

With the weather forcing the sectional semifinals and final onto the same day, Antal knew shed have to pitch at least 14 innings for the Warriors that Saturday. Naturally, both games decided to go extra innings, as the Warriors semifinal game against Fairfield and championship contest against Bremen went 10 innings each. Over that span, Antal pitched all 20 innings, throwing 274 combined pitches, striking out 40 batters and allowing just one earned run. Westview beat Fairfield, 3-2, and Bremen, 1-0, to win the programs first-ever sectional championship, cementing Antals legacy in the Westview softball history books. She nearly pitched the Warriors to a win over Eastside in the regional as well, losing 1-0 against a Blazers team that went on to win the Class 2A state title two weeks later.

5. Noah Bontrager breaks onto the XC scene One of the better debut seasons in recent memory, Westview freshman Noah Bontrager made his presence felt in the cross country world this fall. Along with countless regular season race wins, Bontrager won individual sectional, regional and semi-state titles the latter of which set a new school record with a time of 15:20. He backed up his historic performance the next week with a 12th-place finish at the state meet, earning all-state honors in the process. With three more years left in high school, it feels like the skys the limit for what Bontrager could achieve in the sport.

6. Armen Koltookian dominates on the mat There was no doubt Koltookian was one of the better wrestlers in the area going into the postseason in January, as indicated by his 31-6 record. Few forecasted what hed do in the postseason, however, rolling to sectional, regional and semi-state championships in the 195-pound weight class. The then-junior then lost a tough first round match at the state tournament, concluding his season with a 41-7 record. Given hes already off to a strong start in his senior season, itll be intriguing to see what the now-senior does here on the mat to start the 2023 calendar year.

7. Northridge football wins its second-straight sectional title The Why Not Us sequel wasnt as long as 2021, but Northridge still found a way to win another sectional title, only its third overall in program history. The Raiders upset previously-unbeaten NorthWood, 34-17, in the sectional championship game in Nappanee, with senior wide receiver Jethro Hochstetler having a career night 10 catches, 209 yards and three touchdowns. Northridge head coach Chad Eppley now has an 8-2 postseason record over two seasons, turning two, 5-4 regular seasons into playoff success both years.

8. Westview boys soccer reaches No. 1 in 1A poll Coming off a Class 1A state title in 2021, expectations were high for the Westview boys soccer team in 2022. They somehow exceeded them, putting together a dominant regular season and playoffs before losing in the semi-state match to Park Tudor. The Warriors went 19-2-1 overall, with 16 of those wins coming in shutout fashion. They outscored their opponents 131-10, with junior Teague Misner becoming the programs all-time leading goal scorer along the way. They were the No. 1 team in the Class 1A coaches poll for the majority of the season, with its only losses coming against Class 3A Northridge and aforementioned Park Tudor who won the Class 1A state title game, 9-0, a week after beating the Warriors. Although the season didnt end with a state championship, it was truly one for the history books for Westview.

9. NorthWood boys basketball reaches No. 1 in 3A poll One of the more accomplished boys basketball programs in the area achieved something it had never done during the 2021-22 season: be ranked No. 1. NorthWood reached that milestone with the Jan. 18 poll, which followed after a 49-48 win over Northridge the week prior. The Panthers ultimately headed into the postseason ranked No. 3 in the Class 3A poll, where they won their third-straight sectional championship before losing to Leo in the regional championship game. NorthWood finished the campaign with a 25-3 record, going unbeaten in the Northern Lakes Conference for the first time as well.

10. Beck Willems, Austin Cripe make history at respective schools Is it cheating to put two similar, yet different things as one entry here?

The fun thing about the basketball season is that two things can happen in the same year, yet happen in different seasons. That happened here, as Willems and Cripe both became the all-time leading scorers at Bethany Christian and West Noble, respectively.

Willems accomplished the feat in a game on Feb. 18 against Trinity at Greenlawn, making a free throw with 1:17 left in the game to let him pass 1997 graduate Elliot Friesen atop the schools scoring list. The now-Albion College freshman finished with 1,186 points in his prep career, 39 ahead of Friesen.

Cripes accomplishment was much more recent in fact, it happened last Wednesday, Dec. 21. In the middle of a 36-point performance to knock of Prairie Heights, Cripe became the West Noble all-time leading scorer, passing 1990 alum Doug Targgart. As of Dec. 29, Cripe has career 1,303 points. With two-plus months to go in his senior season, time will tell just how many points the Bethel University commit finishes with.

Honorable mentions (in chronological order): Northridges Jack Moore and Concords Anthony Roberts break their respective schools 1,600-meter race records in the same race at a meet in April; Fairfield freshman golfer Brayden Miller earns all-state honors; both the Fairfield girls tennis and Goshen boys tennis teams go undefeated on their way to semi-state appearances; NorthWood volleyball wins first regional title since 2010.

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

Rafael Nadal, Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer and Andy Murray have "killer instincts" that set them a class apart, says Marin Cilic -…

Posted: at 12:11 am


Rafael Nadal, Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer and Andy Murray have "killer instincts" that set them a class apart, says Marin Cilic

Men's tennis' Big 4 comprising Rafael Nadal, Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer and Andy Murray have separated themselves from the rest of the pack, particularly at the Grand Slams, because of their mental strength and demeanor on the court, believes Marin Cilic. The Croatian attributed the Big 4's dominance to their "killer instincts" and unparalleled attitude, coupled with sheer relentlessness.

Cilic is one of the very few to have won a Grand Slam singles title in the Federer-Nadal-Djokovic-Murray era of dominance, particularly the Big 3. While the likes of Cilic, Stan Wawrinka, Daniil Medvedev, and others over the years experienced what it takes to beat these greats of the sport at the Grand Slams, they were still unable to get the better of them consistently. That is still the case when it comes to Nadal and Djokovic.

Sharing his thoughts on their legacy, Cilic highlighted how the Big 4's ability to control matches mentally more than anything sets them apart.

The 2014 US Open champion praised the "really, really incredible" Big 4 who he believes have been almost impossible to beat at the Grand Slams over the past decade-and-a-half, further stressing their prowess in all aspects of the sport.

The Croatian tennis great also opined that the tendency of many top players to be inconsistent at the Grand Slams often spells danger against the Big 3 particularly, who, more often than not, grab even the smallest window of opportunity provided by their opponents.

Cilic opined that for the Big 3, Nadal and Djokovic going forward as Federer has retired, that aspect will continue to give them a big edge.

While Marin Cilic was already in an exclusive club of non-Big 4 Grand Slam champions over the last 20 years, he became the only player apart from the Big 4 to join another exclusive club during his impressive 2022 season.

By reaching the semifinals of the 2022 French Open, Cilic became the only active player other than Rafael Nadal, Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer, and Andy Murray to reach at least the semifinals at all four Grand Slam tournaments. With Federer's retirement, he is now among just four active players to have that feat in the bag.

The 34-year-old expressed pride in his incredible achievement and is thrilled by his record at the Grand Slams, the tournaments that matter most.

After another stellar year at the Majors in 2022, during which he made a semifinal and a quarterfinal in three appearances, Cilic is now even more motivated to win big.

Check out the first glimpse of Rafael Nadal's baby boy here.

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January 7th, 2023 at 12:11 am

Posted in Mental Attitude

Handling Negative Persons – Patch

Posted: at 12:11 am


Handling negative persons can be difficult. Listening to someone with a pessimistic, doom and gloom attitude drains energy, tests the limits of your patience, and can impact your mental and physical health. Life is too short and precious to be inundated by negative persons. If someone around you, whether a family member or casual colleague, is consistently negative, judgmental, and critical, what can you do about it? Here are some tips from stress manager Eddie Chandler for countering negativity, together with some of my own sentiments:

Accept your limitations: You are neither responsible for nor in charge of changing anothers attitude. In fact, be prepared for shocked disagreement if you call attention to their negativity. While you cannot change other persons, you can control your reaction to them.

Cut others some slack: Check out your assessment. Make sure you're not reading more negativity than is intended in anothers comments and actions. Few people consciously decide to make those around them miserable. Most people generally mean well and have good intentions.

Establish boundaries: Limit contact with pessimistic and selfish people. Regardless of who they are, strive not to let anothers negativity infect you. You can choose not to react to anothers words or actions.

Ask for clarification: Make others clarify, explain and repeat whatever negative sentiment they just expressed. This can help negative persons to realize how they sound and possibly to recognize the groundlessness of what they are saying.

Offer solutions: Point out the positive possibilities and focus on potential benefits rather than pending liabilities. Use empathy and diplomacy without buying into their problem.

Don't get baited: Never fight another's turf war. Take what negative persons say with a grain of salt; it is very likely not completely accurate. Some people complain in the hopes that other persons can be enjoined to fight their battles with or even for them. Don't take their bait. Beware of getting yourself caught in a triangle; refuse to be a messenger between a chronically negative person and someone who has supposedly done them wrong. If you choose to serve as their mediator, have both parties present and keep in mind that any miscommunication is their problem, not yours.

Call them on it: If others start fishing for sympathy, call them on it. Question their maturity and gently advise them to quit complaining. Use humor to point out their pessimistic comments. Try mirroring their attitude by expressing sentiments as negative as theirs. This may appear patronizing, but for some people, this could help them to realize how their defeatist approach sounds, and motivate them to change. In extreme cases, taping or videoing them or taking pictures could also help you to prove your point. When they see their facial expressions, hear their negativity and discover how others behave around them, their negativity is harder to deny. Enlist the help of friends or colleagues to work on the problem together.

Don't let them get to you: Be prepared to ignore the negative comments of a known grouch. Don't let their negativity draw you into a downward spiral. Dont let your perceptions be contaminated by anothers hypercritical world-view. If everything else fails, avoid them entirely so their negativity does not bring you down. A negative environment definitely impacts your productivity at work and your personal relationships. If, despite your best efforts, anothers faultfinding persists and begins to infiltrate your own outlook, walk away. As best you can, remove yourself, even if it is only emotionally, from energy-draining persons.

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