Its 5.30 pm on 1 February 2020. The Union budget for 2020-21 has been presented, the panels microphones have been tested, and the studios cameras have gone live. Up for analysis is the Indian automobile sector.

Anchor: Gentlemen and lady, before I throw the discussion open, I want to personally congratulate the finance minister for a mature, growth-oriented and inclusive budget. It is a budget of the young, for the young and by the young. As the nation gets

Automaker chief executive officer: Butwe are here to discuss what the budget has done for the auto industry. We have been in the dumps for

Anchor: You will get your chance to speak, sir. Please do not disturb the flow of the debate. This 70-year long pessimism cannot be tolerated or encouraged anymore

Component maker CEO: Excuse me, weve been pessimistic only for the last 16 months.

Policymaker: Let me clarify. The world is undergoing a recession, but we have circumvented it. All data shows that. Key indicators are positive.

Component maker CEO: But what about the auto industry? This budget again offers too little and too late. BS6 is just two months away. Manufacturing is still crippled

Anchor: The data proves otherwise, sir.

Automaker CEO: Manufacturing has been down for long. Last quarter, it was flat. 5 biscuit packs and 3 tea pouches are still down. Look at undergarment and tooth powder sales.

Anchor: Please dont fuss over biscuits and briefs. You should focus on your business. The nation demands it.

Component maker CEO: Exactly, that is my point

Anchor: I will come to you later. The policymaker wants to make a point. Do you want to rebut the automobile industry?

Policymaker: Last budget, the sceptics had predicted that the industry will sink. But we are standing, every Indian is standing. We have overcome the global recession. As Nietzsche said, what does not kill us makes us stronger.

Car dealer: Stronger? Standing? A total of 483 dealerships have shut down, close to 36,000 people are out of jobs.

Component maker CEO: Seventeen plants have shut down. No fresh investment. Were operating at 65% capacity. Nearly half a million contract workers jobless till now.

Policymaker: Sorry, that data is unsubstantiated. Moreover, our think tank has released the report called New Age Employment For New India. There are 23 new opportunities being created. Those who lost jobs would have already got absorbed in these new streams.

Anchor: There, look at the positive side; jobs are back. We even have new entrants in the Indian market. Sir, you are a new entrant in India. Tell the viewers

New entrant country head: We Chinese. We assemble electric scooters here. Indian government very open to Chinese companies now. We appreciate Make in India policy.

Millennial: Excuse me.

Anchor: Please wait for your turn, young lady. The policymaker has a point.

Policymaker: Me? Okay. While on Nietzsche, he who has a why" to live, can bear with almost any how".

Banker: May I have a word in?

Anchor: No. Yes, you are the moneybags

Banker: We have always supported nation building, gone out of our way to fund dealers operations. Also, we are charging no loan processing fees for months now. Automakers produced a lot the last year, and pumped it all into the pipeline. The network hardly had any working capital to fund the inventory.

Anchor: Why was that?

Banker: Well, quite a few had invested their money in real estatehotels and resorts. And then the sector tanked.

Anchor: Oho! So, they were all diverting money from one business to another and now acting helpless. You want the government to bail you out? This is totally unacceptable!

Banker: Not all of them, actually.

Anchor: Ones misdeeds cannot force the government to its knees. You simply cannot blackmail policymakers to reduce taxes to cover up for your own follies.

Automaker CEO: I object to that. It is the industry that has been brought to its knees, and you need not break ones knees for that, you need to break the ankles. Taxation is the ankle.

Anchor: This knee and ankle bit is this also Nietzsche?

Automaker CEO: No, I made it up.

Anchor: Ha, posturing as usual. Lets stick to the point.

Component maker CEO: That is exactly my point. We are beating around the bush, without getting to the core GST, jobs, scrappage, BS6

Millennial: Excuse me

Anchor: Oh well, what is it?

Millennial: Could I leave? You guys sort this out. My Uber is waiting, and its getting dark.

Anchor: That does it! Hey, hold on...

Avik Chattopadhyay is co-founder of Expereal, a brand and business strategy firm

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Opinion | A panel discussion to expect after the next budget - Livemint