By DR. RANDY CALE For The Saratogian

Recently, I was phone coaching a separated couple in Seattle as they are struggling with some challenging teen behavior.

The dad works 50+ hours a week, mows the lawn, transports the children to multiple sporting events. Mom works, also takes care of the home, and is struggling with a serious life illness. Together, they are over-whelmed with life.

Yet, their three teenage boys cant pick up their clothes, will not do a chore around the house and spend any free time with friends or playing video games.

Both parents are asking for help with the disrespect and lack of response to the simplest request.

When I began to dig into their philosophy on responsibility and parenting, an interesting and somewhat common comment emerged. Mom related, Well, at least they arent using drugs or stealing from our neighbors. Dad affirmed with, Yes, we are both happy about that.

More and more I work with families who have very few expectations of their children, as it relates to life responsibilities. And, at the same time, these parents are often living a hectic, hurried life with no time to enjoy their children.

In essence, these children are raised in a world where they expect to get it all while contributing very little to the family.

In my view, we have become comfortable with setting standards that are too low, when it comes to participation in the responsibilities of life.

Lets be clear; I am not suggesting that your child should spend every free moment mowing lawns, cleaning floors, and so on. No. I am suggesting that there is a serious consequence that comes from setting basis standards that are too low.

Read more from the original source:
Terrific Parenting: Parents' expectations are too low for their children