If you are a health-conscious person, getting your family to adopt the same values can sometimes seem like a losing battle. Motivating others in your household to become more active and make healthier meal choices may take perseverance, creativity, and being open to communication.

It can be tough on a relationship when one person is active and the one isnt. You may worry about their weight, overall health, mortality, and stress levels.

You cant make a person want to do something, and nagging never seems to get anybody anywhere. Even if a person succumbs to the nagging, the actions are often done begrudgingly and will never last. If this is you, you may feel like you are banging your head against the wall. So, whats the best approach?

Lead by example. Commit to your own exercise and healthy nutrition program. When others see how happy, energetic, and positive you are by taking care of yourself, they may begin wanting some of those same feelings.

Focus on how you feel. In a study published in Womens Health, midlife women who exercised because it made them feel good were more likely to stick with it than women who exercised for their weight or health. The belief that we are motivated by the scale or health statistics is false. Choosing healthy habits for the enjoyment or the intrinsic benefits of feeling great are far more motivating.

If you are trying to help your spouse change, ask them how they feel after participating in a sport or activity. Tie it to feeling good, improved productivity, or something else that matters to them. Helping someone else feel better can help them make the decision to become healthier for themselves, and not just for you.

Make it fun. Think of fun activities that you can do together as a couple. Rent a tandem bike, go hiking, take a walk after dinner, hit tennis balls to each other, or play basketball in the park. Try a cooking class together that focuses on healthier choices. Make it about spending quality time together and having fun, rather focusing on the exercise part of it.

Be supportive. If your spouse is trying at all, be encouraging! Your standards may not be the same as theirs. If they like to walk, but hate running, then encourage the walking pace. If they like to hit tennis balls for fun, and not play competitively, talk about how much fun it is, rather than focusing on perfecting the game. You start to feel burned out at some point, always being the encourager, but dont give up. When they are ready to ask questions, you will have some answers of experience. They may look to you for guidance when you least expect it.

Dont expect change overnight. We are all raised with different family backgrounds that make us who we are. If you were used to eating meat and potatoes every night for dinner, and now have been told to cut out bread and potatoes to lose weight, thats a tough habit to break. It takes patience, understanding which habits will help you feel your best, and moving towards new ideas that are healthy and still enjoyable.

I was raised having some sort of ice cream most nights before bed; do you wonder what I crave? Yes, ice cream is a habit that brings back the comforts of childhood, going to sleep with a full tummy, feeling like my sweet tooth was satisfied, and the memories of watching my mother mix milkshakes by hand.

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Fitness Matters: Motivating a loved one to healthier habits