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Archive for the ‘Self-Improvement’ Category

‘Good to Know’ Review: JoJo forms dream team with Demi Lovato, Tinashe in sultry album that cut out Tory Lanez – MEAWW

Posted: August 28, 2020 at 5:56 am


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JoJo delivered the best gift to her fans back in May in the form of 'Good to Know' her first album in four years and her first since departing Atlantic Records. The R&B album was promoted with the single 'Lonely Hearts' in April, with the single 'Man' being released previously in March along with a music video that had cameos from Ari Lennox, Tinashe, JinJoo, Francia Raisa and JoJo Gomez.

'Good to Know' dropped to widespread critical acclaim with many noting that JoJo's growth as a singer and songwriter was the crux of the release's mature, cohesive sound. JoJo has now returned with a deluxe version of the album, preceded by the release of a new single, 'What U Need'. The new album includes five new tracks, a feature from Demi Lovato on 'Lonely Hearts' and Tinashe on 'Love Reggae', and the omission of Tory Lanez from the track 'Comeback' following his recent involvement in the shooting of Megan Thee Stallion.

Joanna Nolle Levesque, known to her fans as JoJo, debuted with the smash hit 'Leave (Get Out)' and her self-titled album in 2004. Her instant claim to fame was her unparalleled vocals, something most people could hardly believe was emerging from a 13-year-old. It shocked people even more when they learned the young singer was writing her own music. Cut to nearly two decades later and JoJo is still managing to floor audiences with both her vocals and songwriting. 'Good to Know' was most notable for its development of JoJo's artistry. The singer has steadily veered more into more overt sexual themes layered on top of some extremely sensual sounds, but in addition to the maturity in her lyrical themes, the growth in both JoJo's vocals as well as the production on her tracks is readily audible.

But 'Good to Know' is additionally JoJo's most personal record to date. In particular, she chronicles her turbulent journey in the music business, which included a decade-long legal battle for her freedom from her first label Blackground Records, on the album's opening lyrics "Look at me now..." and with that, it is evident JoJo's growth includes a recognition of her own worth and healing from the trauma of having her career "irreparably damaged," as her 2013 lawsuit against Blackground noted.

Standouts from the deluxe version naturally include the duet with JoJo and Lovato. Arguably two of the best vocalists of the current generation, this is a dream team nobody would have predicted we would see in this lifetime. But given the song's focus on self-improvement, self-love and escaping the clutches of codependency, it serves as the perfect vehicle for an epic collaboration. Lovato manages to keep up with JoJo on her most complex runs, a trait she is widely known for, and both singers belt and harmonize in perfect unison. It's a shame we may not get to see this track performed live any time soon, but at least we get to hear this masterpiece on this record for now.

The five new tracks including 'Love Reggae' featuring Tinashe are all absolutely gorgeous R&B tunes with a bit of pop layered in. 'X (1 Thing Wrong)', however, is easily the highlight from the new lot. The slowed-down reverb and bass-heavy track is one of the best R&B tracks to come out this year and has JoJo at her singing and songwriting best.

An overall highlight with this whole release is its stellar production that gives us some gorgeous instrumentals paired with vocals that aren't overproduced or polished to excess. Essentially, we get a rawness in JoJo's voice that truly highlights just why she is one of the best vocalists in the game. Additionally, getting to hear JoJo love herself, especially in light of everything she has been put through at the hands of the music industry executives, is an absolute treat. 'Good to Know' is a stunning release that deserves every bit of the acclaim it has received thus far, and the deluxe version just drives that point further home.

'Good to Know' is out now across digital streaming platforms.

Originally posted here:
'Good to Know' Review: JoJo forms dream team with Demi Lovato, Tinashe in sultry album that cut out Tory Lanez - MEAWW

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August 28th, 2020 at 5:56 am

Posted in Self-Improvement

Finding a Good Mentor: What You Need to Know – Uloop News

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Whether you are just entering the workforce or have been in a specific working field for years, there is always room to improve your skills and open yourself to the advice of an expert. Though you may think of yourself as someone who doesnt need to learn or that you have life figured out, all of us can benefit from being mentored, whether it be in our career path or life in general.

Mentorship can benefit you in several different ways, as it can enhance your life, facilitate growth in your career path, spark personal development, and much more. Maybe you feel as if your work or job position is stagnant and want to advance, or perhaps youre looking for ways to improve your self in all areas of your life- regardless of the need, a mentor is perfect for these types of issues.

Recognizing that you want or need a mentor is one thing, but finding a good mentor can be overwhelming and stressful if you dont know how to go about it. Are you someone trying to find a good mentor but dont know where to start? Unsure of the benefits of having a good mentor? This comprehensive guide will give you all the information you need to know about finding a mentor and how one can enhance your life!

Image via Pexels

What is a Mentor?

Oftentimes, people tend to think the titles mentor and coach are the same, and while they are similar in terms of what each entails, there is a definite difference between the two. While a coach typically offers some sort of developmental help, it is only for a short period of time. A mentorship, however, is more lengthy, according to F. John Reh of The Balance. He elaborates on this, writing, Mentoring consists of a long-term relationship focused on supporting the growth and development of the mentee. Thementorbecomes a source of wisdom, teaching, and support, but not someone who observes and advises on specific actions or behavioral changes in daily work.

In other words, a mentor is a personal cheerleader, giving you insightful encouragement and advice on how to change your perspective on yourself, your job, your life, etc. With an understanding of what a mentor is and what a mentor does, lets dive into the benefits of having a mentor, the qualities to look for in a good mentor, and how to find one!

Networking:No matter what your field of work is, networking is an important component to expanding your career and broadening your contact pool. With a mentor, you not only benefit from the connection you have with him/her, but you also can benefit from their connections as well. While your mentor can help you with different kinds of problems, they can also lead you in the direction of colleagues, friends, or work acquaintances that can give you additional advice, expose you to work environments or careers, and help you build your connections.

Accountability:Whether it be in a professional environment or your personal life, there are always goals that we want to achieve. When we set goals by ourselves, it can be easy to fall back on those goals and become lackadaisical in regards to completing the goals. With a mentor, not only can he/she help you set short and long term goals, but they can also give you meaningful advice as to how to put your goals into action and accomplish them. By having a mentor, you can be held accountable for your flaws, your strengths, the things you want to change, and the goals you wish to accomplish!

Personal Development:Among the various benefits that a mentorship, perhaps the most beneficial aspect is the growth and personal development that you experience along the way. In a work atmosphere or simply in the broader aspects of your life, there should always be room for self-improvement, whether it be work skills, behavioral flaws/setbacks, or simply a bad mindset. In a blog post by Monster, theywrite, Your mentor is the office equivalent of that friend who calls you out if youre out of line. By telling you your strengths and your weaknesses, he or she will help you gain self-awareness, respect your colleagues more, and become a better team player. In short, theyll help you build your character.

Perspective:When struggling in a situation, whether it be work-related or personal, friends and family can be great sources to go to for meaningful advice. The only problem? Family and friends carry natural biases, which can lead them to give tips or advice based on how they feel about you or your relationship with them. While this advice can definitely be respected, a mentors perspective is much more objective and useful, which can give you clarity and a fresh, new perspective on how to solve even your most complicated issues. Dont worry, giving mom a call doesnt hurt too!

Problem Solving:No one likes handling a problem alone. In your work environment, or even in your personal life, tackling an overwhelming problem is never easy, especially if the problem involves someone you are close with (i.e. a boss, colleague, or spouse). Among the broad personal development growth, a mentor can help you solve problems in any realm by giving your mature, relevant, and appropriate advice for any situation. Sarah Price, a blog writer for Surf Careers furtheremphasizesthis, saying, Their experience and insight can stop you from making mistakes and can give you the answers rather than you having to waste valuable time and money working out the right way to handle the situation.

Image via Pexels

When trying to find a good mentor, it can be easy to pick whatever person first comes your way. Ultimately in your search, you want to make sure your prospective mentor has these following qualities, as it will not only make the experience fulfilling for you but also for your mentor!

Expertise or Knowledge in Relevant Field: Though this is an obvious trait to look for, it is nonetheless an important one when finding a mentor that will bring the best out of you. You will want your prospective mentor to have a reasonable amount of expertise and knowledge in a field relevant to you and your work. Whether you are more the artsy type, or in a white-collar job, choosing a mentor with relevant knowledge in your industry will help you gain meaningful information, broaden your perspectives, and grow in your field. In addition, the shared experience of being in the same field will bring both of you together, which can only develop your relationship more.

Passion/Enthusiasm for Sharing the Expertise: Just as it is important for a mentor to be knowledgeable in your industry/field of work, it is also key for a mentor to have a passion and enthusiasm for sharing that knowledge. Some mentors are guilty of being condescending, arrogant, or downright rude in terms of sharing their expertise, leaving the mentee feeling belittled, insignificant, and mistreated. Remember, your goal is to better yourself and grow in your career. If you have a mentor that does anything to make you feel the opposite, he/she is not a good fit for you, and most likely is not a good fit to be a mentor at all.

Empathetic/Understanding Attitude: Sure, the mentor can relate to you because you both have similar career backgrounds, but does he/she understand you on a personal level? Do they empathize with the current problems or issues you may be experiencing in your career or life in general? When looking for a good mentor, you want to ensure that they have an empathetic and understanding attitude toward you. This attitude gives you the ability to grow and thrive in each aspect of your life without judgment. Alyse Kalish of The Muse comments on this, stating, Oftentimes people try to impose their own beliefs or ways of approaching things on others, and this can be a good mentors downfall. So find someone you can trust to take your values and input into account over their own.

Image made via Canva

The Ability to Give Honest and Constructive Feedback:On the contrary, while you want a mentor that is emphatic and understanding, you also want a mentor that can give you honest and constructive feedback, as such is necessary to overcome certain obstacles, change bad behaviors, and ultimately grow as a person and in your career. A good mentor will be respectful, genuine, and always have your best interests in mind. If your mentor suspects you are going down a wrong path or perhaps not making the right choices, they will not hold back in telling you that youre not doing the right thing in order to preserve your feelings.

Willingness to Sponsor You:A mentors job is to support and advise you so you can grow and develop your personal and workplace skills. While a mentor is a great person to have in your corner, if your mentor also actively wants to sponsor you, thats even better. What is the difference between a mentor and a mentor who sponsors you? Better Allieswritesin an article from The Muse that sponsors, vocally support the work of colleagues from underrepresented groups in all contexts, but specifically in situations that will help boost those colleagues standing and reputations.

Start with Your Manager: Depending on your relationship with your manager, you may or may not want to start with them. If you have a good standing with your manager and they are open to helping you out, ask your manager who they would recommend. As your manger is higher than you in terms of their work title, they are likely to know various individuals who would be open to mentoring you. Going about it this way is the simplest, as you interact with your manager on a regular basis and dont have to do an extensive personal search.

Work with Human Resources: If going to your manager first is not an option, your next option is to work with your companys human resources department (if your company has one- most typically do). Contact HR and tell them about your mentor-seeking journey and ask for help. Through HR, you can find different mentoring options that your company might offer.

Search Within the Company You Work For: Youve exhausted your resources in contacting your manager and consulting with human resources, what next? Searching within the company you work for is a great option to find a mentor. Though it can require more energy and work from you, it can be beneficial to reach out to an individual personally rather than through someone else, i.e. a manager or HR worker. Victor Lipman of Forbes suggests, If theres someone else in your company a manager or executive either in your part of the operation or in another area whom you highly respect and feel you could learn from, just go ahead and ask them yourself if theyll mentor you. Before you do this, Victor notes to inform your direct manager that youll be doing this, for transparency!

Be Someone Who is Enjoyable to Mentor: While it may seem like so much of a mentorship relies on the mentor, it relies significantly on you as well! As a mentee, you want to be someone who is enjoyable to mentor, meaning someone who is receptive to what your mentor tells you, actively executing ways to better yourself, and working hard to ensure their work and energy does not go to waste. Kathy Caprino of Forbes poses these important questions to ask yourself, Are you somebody you yourself would like to mentor? Are you open, flexible, resilient, respectful? Are you eager to learn, and committed to modifying how youre interacting in the world so you can have even more success, reward, and happiness? Answering these questions can give you a greater perspective on what you can do to ensure a healthy mentor/mentee relationship takes place.

Put Yourself in Mentors Shoes: People say that empathy is the ability to walk in someone elses shoes or see life from their perspective. Within your mentor relationship, try to put yourself in their shoes to help you understand their position, viewpoints, and perspective. In other words, be someone that is a joy to be mentored!

When it comes to finding a mentor, there are several different factors you want to consider. Evaluate the benefits of having a mentor, look for specific qualities in your prospective mentor, and take the appropriate steps within your work field to find the mentor best for you and your personality. Once you follow those steps, selecting a good mentor for you will be no problem, and will get you on the right path to growing in your life!

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Finding a Good Mentor: What You Need to Know - Uloop News

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August 28th, 2020 at 5:56 am

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Who Is Sarah Edmondson And What Role Did She Play In NXIVM (And It’s Downfall)? – Oxygen

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Sarah Edmondson was a struggling actress when she became fascinated with the self-improvement philosophies of NXIVM. A torturous initiation into a secret society within the group changed her mind.

Sarah Edmondson once believed the self-proclaimed personal development program known as NXIVM was the answer to finding true fulfillment and happiness but as she delved deeper into the organization and uncovered its darkest secrets, she would become one of the organizations most outspoken opponents.

Edmondson played a pivotal role in NXIVMs downfall, speaking out in an October 2017New York Times article about the disturbing branding ritual she had participated in as part of a secret sisterhood within the group.

I wept the whole time, she saidof nearly 30-minute procedure to sear a symbol below her hip. I disassociated out of my body.

Keith Raniere, the groups leader would be arrested in Mexico months later, in March 2018, for operating the alleged sex cult.

Raniere was ultimately convicted in June 2019 on seven charges, including two counts of sex trafficking, racketeering and forced labor conspiracy, according to the U.S. Attorneys Office, Eastern District of New York.

Edmondsonwho estimates she helped recruit 2,000 members during her 12 years with NXIVMis now haunted by her role pushing that BS to others.

I have a lot of guilt about the people I brought in, but if theres one thing I can hang my hat on, its that I never lied. I thought Keith Raniere was the greatest, wisest, most brilliant man on Earth, she told Refinery29last September. I had no idea what was going on with the women and everything that came out in the FBIs investigation.

Edmondsonwho shared her story in the new HBO docuseries The Vowmay have helped bring down one of the nations most shocking cults, but when she first joined the group in her late 20s she was searching for purpose.

The actress had found some success on the small screen, but was also living in a $400-a-month basement apartment, struggling to make ends meet.

I was challenged in my relationship, challenged in my career, she said in The Vow. I had this idea that maybe Id become a famous actor and use my celebrity to have a voice or have an impact on the world. That wasnt happening.

When her filmmaker boyfriend got accepted at a cinema festival at sea, she decided to go along and figure out my purpose in life, she said.

It was there she first crossed path with Mark Vicente, a writer, director and cinematographer who had been on the creative team behind the spiritual documentary What The #$*! Do We (K)now?!

Vicente was already immersed in NXIVM at the time and sat at the same table withEdmondson, who had a persistent cough.

Vicente asked Edmondson what she would lose if she stopped coughing.

I had the awareness instantly that I had linked sickness and attention, Edmondson recalled in the docu-series. I was trying to get my boyfriends attention. I was like Oh my gosh my whole life Ive been so sick as a means for attention.

She felt better the next day and discovered she really liked and respected Vicentewho began casually discussing his connection to NXIVM.

He underplayed it, she said. If anything, I was more interested in working with him and doing whatever he was doing.

Edmondson soon enrolled in one of NXIVMs five-day Executive Success Program training sessions.

At the time I was living in a basement suite where my rent was $400 a month, so for me to spend thousands of dollars on my personal growth was obscene, but I really wanted to change and I really wanted to make that leap, so I put it on my credit card and signed up for the next training, she said.

But it wasnt love at first sight. Edmondsonnow a mother to two boyssaid she found the run-down Holiday Inn where the training was held underwhelming and said the aesthetics and presentations had a totally 80s vibe.

She had a breakthrough, however, on the third day of the session when the topic turned to self-esteem and how limiting beliefs could be holding an individual back from living their best live.

I didnt have love for myself. I didnt have belief in myself, she said in the docu-series. I thought that was just the way that I was and then all of a sudden, I was like, Oh, I can systemically evolve to be the ideal version of myself to write my own character' versus Well, this is who I am.

She soon immersed herself in the self-help group, rising through its ranks to eventually become the co-founder of a Vancouver chapter and begin teaching the groups strategies to others.

I feel like I was soaring. It was almost like a magic, she said in the docuseries. I felt like I was getting downloaded a book of knowledge about people, about society, about the world in general. I really felt like I had this secret potion of understanding.

Edmondson told ABC News she eventually formed a close bond with Lauren Salzmanthe daughter of Nancy Salzman, one of the groups co-founders and top leaders.

Shes like my therapist and in the ranking system, shes also above me, she told the news outlet of her relationship with Lauren.

It was through this connection that Edmondsonwho had to call Lauren mastergot invited to an initiation for a secret sorority within the group that required each participant to give Salzman some expensive collateral to gain entry.

Salzman promised she had something really amazing to share and described the odd request this way, according to The New York Times: Its kind of strange and top secret and in order for me to tell you about it you need to give me something as collateral to make sure you dont speak about it, Edmondson recalled.

Edmonson, who was known as the slave to her master, agreed and provided naked photos of herself.

Each slave in the group, known as DOS, would pledge obedience to their master and was required to send her Master text messages within 60 seconds during training drills to demonstrate herdevotion.

The initiation ceremony took place in an Albany home. The five women in the initiation group were ordered to take off their clothes andsitnaked in a semi-circle; they weretold theyd receive a permanent reminder of their membership in the secret sorority. Edmondson thought theyd be getting small tattoos, but instead each girl was branded with a 2-inch square symbol just below the hip. Edmondson would later realize the symbol looked like KR or Ranieres initials.

It was worse than childbirth, Edmondson told ABC News. Imagine a hot laser, dragged across your flesh for 30 minutes without anesthetic.

Edmondson would later describe the trauma in the opening of her memoir Scarred.

Lying there completely naked, I am at my most vulnerable but determined to prove my strength. I try to keep my legs closed as my body wills itself to protect my most private area, she wrote. I tell myself: I am a warrior. I birthed a human. I can handle pain. But nothing could have ever prepared me for the feel of this fire on my skin."

After Edmondsons husband Anthony Ames, who was also a NXIVM member, learned about the brand, they both decided they wanted out and Edmondson began to speak publicly about her harrowing ordeal and the slow indoctrination she saidled her deeper and deeper into the organization.

If this hadnt happened to me, I would have been the first to say, What an idiot. Why didnt she just leave? The answer is that indoctrination is incredibly powerful, she told Refinery29. If you look at the branding ritual as an example, they convince you that you are triumphing over your own weakness.

Her story was also featured in the first season of the podcast Uncover.

With the experience behind her, Edmondson has gone on to find a new sense of joy.

She continues to act and do voice-over work, taking on roles in Hallmark movies Wedding of Dreams and Welcome to Christmas.

Her latest role in the television movie The Sisterhood has an eerie parallel to her own life. She plays a reporter in a story about a cult-like group of women who are forced to participate in questionable and dangerous activities.

Edmondson, who lives in Vancouver, also regularly posts photos of life with her husband and two young sons on Instagram.

But the mom of two hasnt completely left her years with NXIVM behind. Earlier this year, Edmondson, her husband and nearly 80 anonymous claimants filed a lawsuit against the leaders of NXIVM, including Seagrams liquor heiresses Sara and Clare Bronfman, for emotional and financial harm they suffered as a result of their time with the group, according to CBC.

The lawsuit describes NXIVM as a Ponzi scheme and coercive community designed to financially and emotionally abuse its followers.

Edmondson also continues to work to restore past relationships that suffered from her involvement in one of the nations most perplexing cults.

As I work to regain my personal power and move past what happened, there's a special message I have for the friends and people close to me whom I became distant from or lost contact with over the years I was a proponent of NXIVM's practices: I'm deeply sorry," she wrote in her memoir. "Hopefully, my actions and all that I share in this book will be a step towards making amends as I begin to repair the impact my 12-year journey had on those around me."

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Who Is Sarah Edmondson And What Role Did She Play In NXIVM (And It's Downfall)? - Oxygen

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August 28th, 2020 at 5:56 am

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Everything new coming to FOXTEL ON-DEMAND this September – TV Blackbox

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Ridley Scotts highly-anticipated new sci-fi series Raised by Wolves premieres starring Australian actor Travis Fimmel.

The two-part documentary Save This Shark follows World Champion Surfer Mick Fanning as he returns to the open waters to conquer his fear of sharks and better understand them.

Reality juggernaut Keeping Up with the Kardashians returns, giving viewers an insight into how the family dealt with being in lockdown during the pandemic.

There will be three unmissable Aussie Gold Hunters specials serving up some of the biggest moments from the shows history.

And dont miss HBO documentary series The Vow which takes an in-depth look at the controversial self-improvement group NXIVM, now facing with multiple charges

THU SEPT 3

Raised by Wolves

Ridley Scotts highly-anticipated new science fiction series Raised by Wolves focuses on two androids tasked with raising human children on a mysterious virgin planet. As the burgeoning colony of humans threatens to be torn apart by religious differences, the androids learn that controlling the beliefs of humans is a treacherous and difficult task. Stars Australian actor Travis Fimmel, along with Amanda Collin, Abubakar Salim, Winta McGrath, Niamh Algar, Jordan Loughran, Matias Varela, Felix Jamieson, Ethan Hazzard, Aasiya Shah and Ivy Wong.

TUE SEPT 8

MOVIE DROP: Little Women starring Emma Watson

Jo March reflects back and forth on her life, telling the beloved story of the March sisters four young women, each determined to live life on her own terms. Also stars Saoirse Ronan and Florence Pugh.

TUE SEPT 15

MOVIE DROP: Bad Boys for Life starring Will Smith

Miami detectives Mike Lowrey and Marcus Burnett must face off against a mother-and-son pair of drug lords who wreak vengeful havoc on their city. Also stars Martin Lawrence and Vanessa Hudgens.

WED SEPT 16

Save this Shark

Save This Shark is a two-part documentary that follows the 3 x World Champion Surfer turned ocean activist Mick Fanning on his mission to explore shark conservation. From his hometown of Ballina to the tropics of the Bahamas, Fanning returns to the open waters to conquer his fear of sharks and better understand them. Along the way, Fanning investigates the issue of sharks versus people, debunking common misconceptions and, learning about the latest technology helping humans and sharks safely co-exist while saving them from extinction.

FRI SEPT 18

Keeping Up with the Kardashians S18B

Season 18 returns after a mid-season break due to Covid-19. The new episodes will give viewers an insight into how the family dealt with being in lockdown during the pandemic, with footage filmed inside their homes on iPhones.

Aussie Gold Hunters Specials

The gold hunt continues with three unmissable specials that serve up some of the biggest moments from the shows history. In Countdown to the Motherlode, celebrate the top ten gold finds of all time. Surviving the Wilderness showcases the severe weather, extreme and remote landscapes, and relentless obstacles our gold hungry hunters endure. While Gold Fever delves into the obsessive quest for gold that has pushed people to their limits for centuries chasing a dream of striking it rich.

SUN SEPT 20

The Vow

This nine-part documentary series follows a number of people deeply involved in the controversial self-improvement group NXIVM over the course of several years. With remarkable access to insiders and former members, it takes an in depth look at the organisation faced with various charges, including sex trafficking and racketeering conspiracy, against its highest members most notably founder Keith Raniere, who was convicted in June 2019 and is currently awaiting sentencing.

MON SEPT 28

MOVIE DROP: Birds of Prey starring Margot Robbie

When one of Gothams most sinister villains, Roman Sionis, and his sadistic right-hand, Zsasz, put a target on a young girl names Cass, the citys wicked underbelly is turned upside down looking for her. Harley, Huntress, Canary and Renee Montoyas paths collide and the unlikely foursome have no choice but to team up to take Roman down.

WED SEPT 30

The Great British Sewing Bee

The Great British Sewing Bee is back, with 12 sewers competing over ten weeks with the most perplexing patterns, eye-popping transformations and stunning made-to-measure garments yet. Scrutinising every stitch are Saville Rows Patrick Grant and Central Saint Martinss Esme Young, testing the sewers across a huge range of garments from rugby shirts to childrens dungarees, flamenco skirts to a boned basque.

TUE SEPT 1

MOVIE DROP Bloodshot starring Vin Diesel

Based on the bestselling comic book, Vin Diesel stars as Ray Garrison, a soldier recently killed in action and brought back to life as the superhero Bloodshot by the RST corporation. With an army of nanotechnology in his veins, hes an unstoppable force stronger than ever and able to heal instantly. But in controlling his body, the company has sway over his mind and memories too. Now, Ray doesnt know whats real and whats not but hes on a mission to find out.

MOVIE DROP: Cocaine Godmother starring Catherine Zeta Jones

Academy Award and Tony Award-winning actress Catherine Zeta-Jones stars in Cocaine Godmother: The Griselda Blanco Story, a Lifetime feature based on the life of drug lord Griselda Blanco, a pioneer in the Miami-based cocaine trade.

WED SEPT 2

Doom Patrol S2

Doom Patrol follows the unlikely heroes of the titular team who all got their superpowers through tragic events and are shunned by society. The second season picks up after the group defeated Mr. Nobody and discovered Dr. Caulders dark secret that he had caused the tragic events that gave them their powers, in an effort to protect his daughter.

Animal Impossible

Tim Warwood and Adam Gendle risk life and limb to uncover the truth about animals in this eye-opening and entertaining series from the renowned BBC Studios Natural History Unit. Do cats always land on their feet? Could a squid sink a ship? Is spider silk really stronger than steel? Endlessly curious presenters Tim and Gendle want to find out.

MON SEPT 7

Ollies Pack

Ollies Packis an animated comedy about Ollie, a 13-year old boy who protects and controls a backpack portal to the world of monsters.

The Nile: 5000 Years of History

Professor Bettany Hughes sets sail on an epic journey through the history and highlights of Ancient Egypt. Travelling on her own traditional Dahabiya boat, Bettany journeys almost 1,000 miles from Cairo to the Aswan Dam on the mighty River Nile stopping off at the most iconic and dazzling sites along the way. From ancient gossip on the sex lives of the rich and famous to a close up encounter with King Tuts grandmother, this colourful travelogue interweaves mystery, revelation, stunning visuals and diverse modern-day encounters to create a unique and unforgettable journey through the highlights of Ancient Egyptian history.

THU SEPT 10

Noughts + Crosses

Adapted from the first book inMalorie Blackmans bestselling series, the much-anticipatedNoughts + Crossesis a gripping story of first love set in a dangerous, alternate world where racism divides society. Separated by their colour but united by forbidden love and burning injustice, Sephy Hadley (Masali Baduza) and Callum McGregor (Jack Rowan) are fighting for more than simply the right to be together. Sephy is a Cross, a member of the black ruling class and daughter of a prominent politician. Callum is a Nought, a white member of the underclass. The two have been friends since childhood, but thats as far as it can go. Their relationship grows ever more complicated as they come of age and against a backdrop of prejudice, distrust and rebellion, the passionate romance that builds between them will lead them both into terrible danger.

TUE SEPT 15

MOVIE DROP: Bad Boys for Life starring Will Smith

Miami detectives Mike Lowrey and Marcus Burnett must face off against a mother-and-son pair of drug lords who wreak vengeful havoc on their city. Also stars Martin Lawrence and Vanessa Hudgens.

THU SEPT 17

Friends S1-10 (Complete series drop)

The smash-hit, Emmy Award-winning comedy that influenced a generation with its unique take on the trials and tribulations of six friends living and learning about life in New York City, remains one of the most popular shows of all time.

Island of Bryan S2

In season 1, we saw Bryan and Sarah Baeumler move their family to an undeveloped island in the Bahamas to renovate a rundown resort. Season 2 picks up where season 1 left off: after a rollercoaster year of construction, the resorts grand opening date is set just a few months away. With the budget maxed out and more at stake than ever, Bryan and Sarah will have to tackle the seemingly impossible in order to transform the property into their spectacular vision: Caerula Mar Club.

Archer S11 (FOX8)

Emmy Award-winning animated comedy Archer returns its 11th season. Following Suave international spy Sterling Archer and his cohorts at a New York-based intelligence agency as they battle rival spies, exotic enemies and their own dysfunctional personalities, Season 11 is set to follow the titular super spy after he awakens from a three-year coma.

FRI SEPT 18

The Bradshaw Bunch (E!)

Legendary quarterback and television-broadcast icon and actor Terry Bradshaw gives viewers an intimate look at life in the off-season with his family.

TUE SEPT 22

Jeffrey Dahmer: Mind of Monster

This special is chillingly narrated by the words of Jeffrey Dahmer himself. The Milwaukee Cannibal raped, killed, and dismembered 17 young men between 1978 and 1991. It features audio recordings from extensive police interviews; a heart-wrenching interview with his father; Ronald Flowers, a victim who narrowly escaped murder; Dr. Park Deitz, a former psychiatrist who spent time with Dahmer; and a never-before-seen interview with Nicole Childress, a witness plagued with guilt. Home video footage offers an intimate look into his relatively normal upbringing, making his case particularly unsettling.

MOVIE DROP A Beautiful Day In the Neighbourhood starring Tom Hanks and Matthew Rhys

Tom Hanks portrays Mister Rogers in this timely story of kindness triumphing over cynicism, based on the true story of a real-life friendship between Fred Rogers and journalist Tom Junod. After a jaded magazine writer (Rhys) is assigned a profile of Fred Rogers, he overcomes his scepticism, learning about kindness, love and forgiveness from Americas most beloved neighbour.

WED SEPT 23

The West Memphis Three: An ID Murder Mystery (COMPLETE SEASON DROP)

West Memphis, Arkansas, is an American town not much different than any other. But when the parents of three young boys realize their sons are missing on the evening of May 5, 1993, the police uncover a triple homicide that turns into one of the most chilling cases in recent history. Police discover the bodies in what looks like a ritualistic murder scene, and with a demonic presence looming, the people of West Memphis suspect evil lives among them. Investigators quickly seize three teen suspects they believe are Satanists. The trio, later nicknamed the West Memphis Three, seem like the obvious suspects, but with no evidence connecting them to the cult-like killings, are they truly guilty or just easily targeted outsiders?

SAT SEPT 26

Pamela Smart: An American Murder Mystery (COMPLETE SEASON DROP)

Sex, lies, and a tale too twisted to be real surround the murder of Gregg Smart. Who killed him and why? On May 1, 1990, 22-year-old media coordinator Pamela Smart finds her husband Gregg dead on the floor of their southern New Hampshire condo, leaving the town of Derry stunned. Scouring the region for clues, police shift their attention to Greggs grieving widow, Pamela Smart, who has been making curious television appearances publicising her plight. When investigators discover Pamela has been having a sordid affair with high school student, Billy Flynn, a complicated web of lies and deceit unravel, revealing one of the most scandalous crimes of the century.

SUN SEPT 27

Aaron Hernandez: An ID Murder Mystery (COMPLETE SEASON DROP)

The story of Aaron Hernandez is one of the most stunning falls from grace in recent history. Once hailed as a hero for the New England Patriots, Hernandez is now considered an American tragedy. After beginning a promising NFL career at the age of 20, few could ever imagine he would be on trial for murder. Fans were perplexed, but as the investigation unfolded, more unknown factors were revealed. The public was exposed to the dangerous inner workings of Hernandezs psyche, seeing the anger, secrets and struggles that simmered beneath the All-American faade.

MON SEPT 28

Masterchef S16

MasterChef is back and the kitchen is open for 60 of the UKs most outstanding amateur cooks to battle it out for the 2020 title. The contestants compete over five weeks of Heats. This year they will have to cook not only for their place in the competition but also the right to wear a coveted MasterChef apron. With six contestants in each Heat and only four aprons up for grabs, the battle is fierce from the offset. John Torode and Gregg Wallace

TUE SEPT 29

Brittany Murphy: An ID Mystery

Brittany Murphy was a rising star who had it all, but she also had secrets. When found dead in her Los Angeles home at just 32 years old, legions of fans were left in disbelief. Later, her husband, Simon Monjack, and mother, Sharon Murphy, embarked on a bizarre media blitz, and within months, Monjack perished under strikingly similar circumstances. In an exclusive final interview, the late Angelo Bertolotti, Brittanys father, casts doubt on the conclusion that she died of natural causes. Brittany Murphy: An ID Mystery revisits the case through intimate interviews, in-depth access to forensic details and more.

The Lady Killers

Men kill in rage, to control, to steal, to exert powerso why and how do women kill? So often, its about lost love, a desire for wealth, revenge. This true crime series investigates the stories of the women who killhow they kill by fire, poison, hiring a hitman or with guns or knivesoften different but sometimes chillingly like male homicide. From interviews with those close to Lady Killers, psychologists and criminologists, to dramatic reconstruction, this series answers the key questions as to why women take the lives of those close to them.

WED SEPT 30

MOVIE DROP: Miss Fisher and the Crypt of Tears starring Essie Davis

After freeing a young Bedouin girl, Shirin Abbas, from her unjust imprisonment in Jerusalem, Miss Fisher begins to unravel a wartime mystery concerning a priceless jewel, an ancient curse and the truth behind the suspicious disappearance of Shirins forgotten tribe.

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Everything new coming to FOXTEL ON-DEMAND this September - TV Blackbox

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August 28th, 2020 at 5:56 am

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Judge Sentences Arcata Man to 11 Years to Life for Attempted Murder, More Than a Year After a Jury Convicted Him of the Crime – Lost Coast Outpost

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PREVIOUSLY:

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More than a year after a jury convicted Nicholas Kistler of attempted murder, the 36-year-old Arcata man was sentenced this morning to 11 years to life in state prison.

Kistler.

Judge Christopher Wilson sentenced Kistler to seven years for premeditated attempted murder, three years for causing great bodily injury and one year for use of a weapon, a hammer. Kistler used the hammer to strike a man twice over the head, fracturing his skull, in April 2017 on the Arcata Plaza. Kistler had attempted to disguise himself with a bandana.

Before the sentencing, defense attorney Andrea Sullivan asked the judge to consider that Kistler was provoked when he attacked (the victim) and deeply regrets his decision. During his more than three years behind bars, Kistler participated in numerous programs and was awarded multiple certificates.

He has done tremendous work while in custody, Sullivan said.

She asked the judge to strike the weapons conviction, which would cut one year from Kistlers sentence.

Kistler, on video conference from the jail, read a lengthy statement taking responsibility for his crime and vowing to change his thinking and my behavior. He blamed his actions partially on drug addiction.

It lays heavily on my heart, Kistler said, that I found myself in such a low place that my actions were to paint an entirely different picture than what Ive always seen as who I am as a person I have made a personal commitment to nonviolence as a way of life and have not been in a single physical altercation or even so much as an argument during the the 3 1/2 years of my incarceration to date.

While in jail, Kistler took advantage of every program offered and earned dozens of certificates.

My path today is one of accountability and personal responsibility, he said.

Kistler was convicted in March 2019. The sentencing was delayed first by his failed attempt at getting a new trial, and then with his claim that his trial attorney hadnt represented him adequately.

Deputy District Attorney Luke Bernthal, the trial prosecutor, argued today that the weapons enhancement should not be stricken. Although defense attorney Sullivan claimed Kistler was provoked, that factual scenario was soundly rejected by the jury, who was instructed on attempted voluntary manslaughter as a possible crime and instead came back with a finding that the defendant had committed premeditated attempted murder, Bernthal said.

The jury also found, he said, that Kistler perjured himself on the witness stand.

As to Kistlers stellar performance as an inmate, Bernthal sees him in a different light. I look at the defendants record and I see one of someone who was a violent individual whos been spiraling out of control since 2014, Bernthal told the judge. Serious, escalating violence.

Among Kistlers many previous crimes were battery on a police officer and possession of a dirk or dagger. He fought with Winco employees after stealing from the store. One battery case was dismissed, and Kistler managed to defeat other charges related to a case eerily similar to this one, Bernthal said.

He purports to regret his actions, the prosecutor said. But everything that he has done, from the perjury he committed during his trial, the litigation afterward, frankly the speech that he has given today, is in the Peoples view simply evidence that he believes that he can continue to get away with these things as he has gotten away with them in the past.

Bernthal said its unfortunate it took this case to bring home to him, that he cannot, for example, disguise himself in broad daylight and hit somebody two times in the head with a hammer, trying to kill them.

Before Wilson imposed the sentence he commended Kistler on his efforts at self-improvement while in jail.

Mr. Kistler you are still a young man, Wilson said. I think that your accomplishments while youve been custody are admirable, and you shouldnt feel like those are wasted upon the court. They are certainly not wasted on any review board that might consider your ultimate release. Continue those efforts. You have time to make changes to your life and lifestyle that have led you to this unfortunate place.

At the same time, the judge said, the law allows him no discretion in sentencing other than the option of striking the weapons allegation.

Im not inclined to do that, Wilson told Kistler. Really its part and parcel of this particular event. I think that the jury, given the choice of weapon that was used here, that that was probably a significant factor in making the finding of premeditation and deliberation and the intent to kill. Certainly the selection of (a hammer) would perhaps suggest that.

Kistler was given credit for 1,242 actual days served, plus 186 days of good time credit.

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Judge Sentences Arcata Man to 11 Years to Life for Attempted Murder, More Than a Year After a Jury Convicted Him of the Crime - Lost Coast Outpost

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An interview with Ervin Cohen & Jessup discussing dispute resolution in the United States – Lexology

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Lexology GTDT Market Intelligence provides a unique perspective on evolving legal and regulatory landscapes. This interview is taken from the Dispute Resolution volume discussing topics including Brexits impact on choice of law and jurisdiction, market competition and the popularity of ADR within key jurisdictions worldwide.

1 What are the most popular dispute resolution methods for clients in your jurisdiction? Is there a clear preference for a particular method in commercial disputes? What is the balance between litigation and arbitration?

The principal alternatives to court litigation are arbitration and mediation.

As to arbitration, there has been considerable appellate litigation, and, in one notable case, legislation affecting this form of dispute resolution.

The appellate litigation has largely focused on questions about the requisites for the enforcement of agreements to arbitrate, the kinds of claims that will be exempt from arbitration and whether federal law in the form of the Federal Arbitration Act (the FAA) will pre-empt state statutes concerning arbitration procedure and enforcement that conflict with the federal scheme.

In terms of legislation, the California Legislature continues to express hostility towards arbitration, especially in the employment context. In a new law effective 1 January 2020, California employers can no longer require workers to arbitrate state law discrimination or wrongful termination claims. Although the enforcement of that new law has been temporarily stayed, its enactment was inspired by the #MeToo movement and was intended to prevent the silencing of workers who have experienced discrimination.

As to mediation, this form of dispute resolution remains popular in connection to the resolution of civil and business disputes. Indeed, the popularity of this form of alternative dispute resolution has resulted in the development of law in connection with this area.

In 2019, the California Legislature enacted an amendment to Californias Evidence Code, which now requires attorneys to advise their clients in writing on the implications of Californias legal protections for mediation communications before the client agrees to mediation.

2 Are there any recent trends in the formulation of applicable law clauses and dispute resolution clauses in your jurisdiction? What is contributing to those trends? How is the legal profession in your jurisdiction keeping up with these trends and clients preferences? Does Brexit continue to affect choice of law and jurisdiction?

By far, the most important trend is the inclusion of mandatory arbitration provisions in commercial agreements. This trend has spawned significant trial and appellate court litigation concerning the enforcement of those agreements, including the interplay between the FAA (which is strongly pro-arbitration) and corresponding state statutes that, in some cases, impose limits and restraints on the enforcement of arbitration agreements.

Importantly, California does not recognise or enforce pre-dispute jury trial waivers. Indeed, in a case from October 2019, the California Court of Appeal declined to enforce choice of law and choice of forum provisions in a commercial contract on the grounds that the enforcement would lead to the forfeiture of a California residents right to a jury in connection with a civil dispute. The case highlights the sanctity of the right to jury trial, which is safeguarded in both the US and California state constitutions.

3 How competitive is the legal market in commercial contentious matters in your jurisdiction? Have there been recent changes affecting disputes lawyers in your jurisdiction? How is the trend towards niche or specialist litigation firms reflected in your jurisdiction?

The California State Bar allows attorneys to earn certifications in approximately 12 subject areas and, thereby, promote themselves as certified specialists in those areas. Those areas currently include family law, taxation law and estate planning, trust and probate law. Except for a certification in appellate law, the California State Bar does not currently offer certifications in the areas of dispute resolution, arbitration or alternative dispute resolution.

Outside the State Bar certification programme, attorneys practising in dispute resolution typically organise themselves into speciality groups, such as firms that specialise in plaintiff class action, white-collar defence, products liability defence and personal injury. The pertinent bar rules governing attorney advertising permit law firms to identify their core areas of expertise in their communications to clients and the public at large.

4 What have been the most significant recent court cases and litigation topics in your jurisdiction?

There are two sets of emerging issues in California.

The first area is in connection with labour and employment disputes. In this area, the California Supreme Court issued a decision in 2018, inDynamex Operations West, Inc v Superior Court of Los Angeles, that reversed decades of precedent concerning the classification of workers as either employees or independent contractors. UnderDynamex, the court ruled that workers are presumptively employees and not contractors, and it imposed the burden on the hiring entity that classifies a worker as a contractor to establish that this classification is supported under the ABC test that it articulated in its decision.

This is a very worker-friendly decision that has profound implications for companies such as Uber and others in the gig economy marketplace. Indeed, companies in that marketplace have undertaken efforts to overturnDynamexthrough the referendum and legislative processes.

In addition toDynamex, the recent legislative initiatives Assembly Bill 51 and Senate Bill 707 impact the ability of employers to enforce mandatory arbitration provisions in connection with labour and employment disputes in California.

Separate and apart from labour and employment, the California Legislature recently passed the California Consumer Privacy Act (the CCPA), which enacts a comprehensive privacy regime affecting businesses operating in California. Among other things, it requires companies to update their privacy policies and provide specified notices about their collection of personal information, use and sharing practices. In addition, it provides for a private right of action for individuals affected by data breaches or the compromise of their personal information.

Although the CCPA is too new for there to have been any appellate cases interpreting its provisions, its enactment will undoubtedly spur the filing of privacy-related litigation in California.

5 What are clients attitudes towards litigation in your national courts? How do clients perceive the cost, duration and the certainty of the legal process? How does this compare with attitudes to arbitral proceedings in your jurisdiction?

Im interpreting national courts to mean the federal district courts and courts of appeal as distinct from the state courts. As many readers may know, the US has two sets of trial and appellate courts corresponding to the federal and state systems.

The conventional wisdom is that the quality of the judges in the federal system is superior to that in the state system. The federal courts also tend to be more rule-bound than the state court system and stricter in terms of the enforcement of deadlines so that defendants sued in state court will often remove a pending case to the relevant US district court. Removal is a matter of right if there is subject matter jurisdiction in the federal court.

Arbitration is the primary alternative to court litigation. It is widely accepted that arbitration is less expensive, and more efficient, than conventional litigation. This is in part because there is not ordinarily the same degree of wide-ranging discovery in arbitration that is allowed in conventional litigation. Defendants often favour arbitration because it allows for dispute resolution without a right to a jury trial.

6 Discuss any notable recent or upcoming reforms or initiatives affecting court proceedings in your jurisdiction.

There were only a few amendments in 2019 to Californias Code of Civil Procedure, which governs procedures in state trial courts. Perhaps the most notable of these is a rule that would allow parties to stipulate an initial disclosure requirement modelled after Rule 26 of the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure.

If parties opt in by stipulation to this requirement, they must exchange information at the inception of litigation. The information will include the identity of all persons likely to have discoverable information, along with the subjects of that information, that the disclosing party may use to support its claims or defences; copy or description of all documents, including electronically stored information, that the disclosing party has in its possession, custody or control that may be used to support its claims or defences; insurance agreements; and indemnification agreements.

Importantly, this new state court procedure is triggered only by agreement of the parties, whereas the disclosure requirements under Rule 26 of the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure are mandatory.

7 What have been the most significant recent trends in arbitral proceedings in your jurisdiction?

Both the California Legislature and the California appellate courts have expressed hostility to pre-dispute arbitration agreements. This hostility is especially strong in the context of consumer and employeeemployer disputes, where the perception is that consumers and employees lack meaningful bargaining power in resisting the imposition of those agreements. Indeed, two legislative initiatives passed in 2019, Assembly Bill 51 and Senate Bill 707, impact the ability of Californian employers to compel arbitration of labour and employment disputes.

Outside the consumer and employee contexts, pre-dispute arbitration agreements, if properly drafted, are usually enforced. The key battleground in this area is often whether the pro-arbitration procedural rules of the FAA will displace the state procedural rules governing the enforcement of agreements to arbitrate. This is an ongoing battle in which the state and federal courts have issued divergent decisions.

8 What are the most significant recent developments in arbitration in your jurisdiction?

There have been two highly significant Legislative developments in California affecting arbitration.

Assembly Bill 51, signed by California Governor Gavin Newsom in October 2019, prohibits employers from requiring mandatory arbitration agreements from employees. Although enforcement of this new law has been temporarily stayed, its enactment underscores the California Legislatures hostility to mandatory arbitration, especially in employment and consumer-related disputes.

Senate Bill 707, also signed by Governor Newsom last year, provides that in the context of employment disputes that are governed by arbitration employees cannot be required to bear any type of legal costs or expenses incident to the arbitration process. This new law also provides that an employers failure to pay those arbitration costs or expenses will constitute a material breach of the arbitration agreement.

9 How popular is ADR as an alternative to litigation and arbitration in your jurisdiction? What are the current ADR trends? Do particular commercial sectors prefer or avoid ADR? Why?

Mediation is utilised in a significant proportion of civil cases in California. Arbitration is typically utilised only where the parties have a pre-dispute arbitration agreement. This is thought to be because plaintiffs will typically want to preserve their right to a jury trial.

The Inside Track

What is the most interesting dispute you have worked on recently and why?

Some years ago, I successfully represented a well-known celebrity in a case brought by a former franchisee couple of the celebritys company, who claimed they had been indoctrinated into believing the celebritys programme for self-improvement and, as a result, had improvidently given up their former jobs and lifestyle. The case was interesting because although it was styled as a suit for damages, it questioned the responsibility for individual decision-making in circumstances where the plaintiffs alleged that they had been hypnotised owing to the celebritys cult-like persona.

Describe the approach adopted by the courts in your jurisdiction towards contractual interpretation: are the courts faithful to the actual words used, or do they seek to attribute a meaning that they believe the parties actually intended?

California follows, at least in theory, the objective theory of contracts. This means that the interpretation of contracts is generally a matter for the court as distinct from the jury. The court will ordinarily determine the legal meaning and effect of a written contract, giving effect to the words in their ordinary meanings. The parties subjective, uncommunicated intent about the meaning of the contract is ordinarily inadmissible. The key exception is when a contract term is ambiguous. In that case, extrinsic evidence, such as evidence concerning the parties negotiations or, in some cases, expert testimony, will be admitted to explain or clarify an ambiguity.

What piece of practical advice would you give to a potential claimant or defendant when a dispute is pending?

It is critical that all litigants maintain and preserve electronic records, including emails. Failure to do so may result in the court giving a jury instruction concerning spoliation of evidence that could adversely affect the litigants credibility to the jury

An initial strategy call for defendants will be whether there are any opportunities to change the forum for the litigation. They should also consider at the outset whether there are any coverage opportunities under any policies of liability insurance.

For plaintiffs, the selection of forum is critical at the outset. They must also consider at the outset the availability of provisional remedies as the issuance of these often have an outcome determinative impact on the course of the litigation.

Excerpt from:
An interview with Ervin Cohen & Jessup discussing dispute resolution in the United States - Lexology

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August 28th, 2020 at 5:56 am

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The Power of Positive Thinking: Too Much and Never Enough – The Bulwark

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When published in 1952, The Power of Positive Thinkingwas a progenitor of what came to be known as the prosperity gospel (a belief popularized by televangelists that God intends Christians to be healthy and wealthy) and one of the very first Christian self-help books. America stood astride the globe, and the Greatest Generation was clamoring to catch up from the deprivations of the war years. Americans were making everything from cars to babies at astounding rates and creating civic organizations and churches to support growing families and communities. The Power of Positive Thinkings message of optimism and self-improvement was perfectly suited to one of the most optimistic eras in American history.

The books teachings are straightforward, organized around 10 key principles, like the laws of Moses. The author, Norman Vincent Peale, recommends visualizing success, drowning out negative thinking, and minimizing obstaclespretty much a Tony Robbins seminar or a Sunday morning with Joel Osteen. Certain Bible verses (I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me; If God be for us, who can be against us?) stripped of context, interpretation, and theology, are to be repeated 10 times per day to ward off the evil spirit of negative thought. The purpose of these psychological and spiritual practices is to free individuals from self-doubt and feelings of inferiority and help them to become the people God truly intends them to be: happy, wealthy, popular, and professionally successful.

In a way, the principles of the book were as old as the country itself. Ever since the first buckled Puritan shoe stepped onto North American shores, prosperity has been interpreted as proof of election and poverty, by extension, of damnation. (Forget what you read in the Sermon on the Mount, the poor arent blessed and even if they inherit the earth theyll get nothing more than dirt.) While its hard to imagine a successful, capitalist economy without it, Puritan Christianity often leaves Christians feeling exhausted, anxious, and guilt-ridden, sinners in the hands of an angry God who looks at their brokenness and suffering and says, You arent doing it right. Try harder.

Peale took a kinder, gentler tack than Jonathan Edwards. Peale was exceptional for cutting the flock some spiritual slack, encouraging them to look for the sunny side and conquer their inferiority complexes. In his world, you can have the economic gains minus the guilt, which seems perfectly suited to the American sensibility. For a public with access to few effective mental health treatmentslithium had just come onto the market as a mood stabilizer in 1948and weighed down by the demands of extroverted Americanism, The Power of Positive Thinking must have been a like a tonic, or perhaps a gin and tonic, something to soothe the wired, weary, worried soul.

The book sold millions of copies and was eventually translated into more than 40 languages, and Peale, from his pulpit at Marble Collegiate Church in Manhattan, became central to the spiritual life of the family of Fred Trump Sr., his wife, Mary, and the four Trump children, including the future president. Donald Trump once recalled how he could listen to Peale all day and be disappointed when it was over. He neednt have worried: Peales ideas would take pride of place in the life of Trumps family and Americas for decades to come.

The Power of Positive Thinking may have been a salve for the average, emotionally troubled, success-burdened American but it was also well suited to justifying and exacerbating the pathologies of the Trump family and businesses. In her recent memoir, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the Worlds Most Dangerous Man, Mary Trump (the presidents niece who also happens to have a Ph.D. in psychology) paints a portrait of Fred Trump Sr. as a sociopath, utterly uninterested in entering into the moral, emotional, and psychological world of his family or its members. In keeping with Peales teaching, he would no more hear about his wifes or childrens problems than he would accept a failed business deal. Mary, a woman who suffered multiple illnesses including debilitating osteoporosis, was in and out of the hospital (which she appears to have enjoyed as a respite from her husband) and lived much of her life in physical pain. As she grimaced, Fred would just say, Everythings great, right Toots? refusing to acknowledge, much less accommodate, her illness.

Fred Sr.s psycho-emotional stonewalling played out most acutely in relationship with his namesake, Fred Junior. Never suited to the family business, Jr. attempted to strike out on his own only to be bullied back into Trump Management, the familys real estate company, by both Fred Sr. and Donald. As recounted in Too Much and Never Enough, Fred Jr. was then further abused, repeatedly denied authority, second-guessed at every turn, and blamed for every problem, setback, and failure in a perverse tag-team between Fred Sr. and Donald. The abuse fed his alcoholism, which, in the familys Peale-informed understanding, was not a disease requiring treatment but the result of Fred Jr.s negative thinking. When the son went to the father for help, Fred Sr. replied, Just give it a quarter turn on the mental carburetor or Just make up your mind, Fred. Fred Jr. replied, rather wanly, Thats like telling me to make up my mind to give up cancer. Fred Jr.s deepening alcoholism only elicited increasing abuse from his father and brother seemingly under the theory that if they were hard enough on him he would turn around. Even in his final crisis, afflicted by fatal, alcohol-induced cardiac problems, no member of the family went with him to the hospital (Donald Trump went to a movie instead). Dying, it appears, is the result of late-stage negative thought.

These are the problem-solving strategies that Donald Trump brought to his marriages, six corporate bankruptcies, presidential campaign, and now, what increasingly appears to be a failed presidency. The consistent element in each of these has been to deny negative realities and keep moving. The casinos, the airline, the football league, Trump Vodka, Trump Steaks, Trump University . . . all bear the same markings of hyper optimism and overpromise/underdeliver salesmanship. Recorded on tape talking about sexual assault? No problem, just bluster your way through. Tell your team, this doesnt sound like me. He wasnt so much denying the charge to the public as much as denying it to himself, turning away from a distasteful glimpse of himself in the mirror. When he was presented with incontrovertible evidence of Russian interference in domestic U.S. politics, he didnt just deny it (and continue to do so) he fired the messengers and shrank the White House offices that insisted on delivering the bad news.

Now we have Trump COVID-19 and its following the same pattern. The virus is very well under control and going to fade away. Or it can be cured by malaria drugs or maybe some light or injected disinfectant. (Or, as recently announced, overruling NIH experts to insist on an emergency use authorization for convalescent blood plasma despite uncertain results on its efficacy.) Slow down the testing and well have fewer cases. You see, conquering COVID-19 is just a matter of substituting positive thoughts for negative data. Various theories have been floated to explain Trumps resolute unwillingness to deal directly and truthfully with the crisis: stupidity (hes anything but stupid), arrogance, and deceit among them. Its really much simpler than that. Trumps just doing what hes always done: conquering the challenge by blinding himself to it, just the way Reverend Peale taught him and his father insisted upon.

It is sometimes said a little bit of religion is often worse than no religion. My AEI colleague, Brad Wilcox, documented that men who identified as evangelical but infrequently attend church were more likely to engage in domestic violence than evangelicals who regularly attended church, mainline Protestants and those who never attend church. Wilcox believes this results from a kind of doctrinal cherry-pickingbig on authority, sovereignty, and power but closed to other-directed teachings like altruism and self-sacrifice. Weak attachment to religious faith tends to put some of the worst behaviors on steroids.

As he lays out early in The Power of Positive Thinking, Peale wanted people to be hopeful, kind, and optimistic, and to become people persons. The Trump family heard the positive thinking, personal empowerment parts, which integrated easily with its win-at-all-cost ideology, but they, or at least Donald, missed the bits about seeking counsel from others and living a life of dependence upon God. For Donald Trump, and now the United States of America, the Power of Positive Thinking and its encouragement to irrational optimism, has helped make the American pandemic response a failure by almost any measure.

In a 2009 interview on failure with Psychology Today, the then-host of The Apprentice said he refused to be sucked into negative thinking on any level, even when the indications werent great. His optimism, though all-encompassing as it relates to himself, is abandoned in relationship to others. Every person Trump meets is assumed to be as nakedly self-serving as he is. Trumps world is a dark one but also a sad and disappointing one in which he is always denied his due by nasty opponents, which includes anyone who goes so far as to demur from his claims of greatness. Hobbes said human existence was a state of nature, a war of all against all. The state of Trumpian nature pits all against himand, more importantly, him against all, an anti-human worldview that stands Norman Vincent Peale on his head. For Donald Trump, The Power of Positive Thinking has turned out to be both too much, and at the same time, never enough.

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The Power of Positive Thinking: Too Much and Never Enough - The Bulwark

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August 28th, 2020 at 5:56 am

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We must not deny racism, but we must also not exploit it to stop reconciliation – Daily Maverick

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Issues abound and of late, while race-based concerns have risen to global prominence, in South Africa, race has always more than simmering below the surface been centre stage of our social, economic and political interactions.

Many embrace this centrality, others lament the reduction of almost everything to race. Still, most current issues be they racial, geopolitical, gender, discrete transgressions of human rights, public health, education, unemployment or inequality and more are connected by a golden thread: Othering, the process of stigmatisation that defines another and sets them apart in a way that renders them an outsider.

To be clear, the opposite of Othering is not saming, it is belonging. And as John A Powell, director of the Haas Institute for a Fair and Inclusive Society at the University of California, Berkeley, says, belonging does not insist that we are all the same. It means we recognise and celebrate our differences, in a society where we the people includes all the people and does not involve a presupposition that ones own race or nationality is inherently superior to another. To treat those of other races and nationalities with unfairness or unequal justice, with dismissiveness or with active contempt, is pernicious.

The recent revelations of Makhaya Ntini, the first ethnically black South African to play for the national cricket team, about his experience of loneliness is a reflection of being Othered. A senior black woman in politics who once confided in me her experience of being Othered and how many of her peers didnt even know her name provides another example.

Many will recount similar encounters, and these form a part of the basis of the Black Lives Matter (BLM) movement. It is important, however, to acknowledge that class regardless of race also allows for the othering of people and that it is also not incumbent on others to embrace you you must embrace yourself. As Steve Biko remarked, as a prelude whites must be made to realise that they are only human, not superior. Same with blacks. They must be made to realise that they are also human, not inferior. The subtext is that inferiority needs to be countered by self-improvement and self-confidence.

In this vein, I ask myself then, why have I not felt othered? Im old enough, after all, to remember encountering, first hand, the engravings on benches and signs on buses and buildings that read Europeans Only. My parents were imprisoned, banned and placed under house arrest by the apartheid regime. Friends and close family members were hounded, some tortured. I was arrested. My marriage to a white woman was in contravention of the Immorality Act. My children suffered the stigma of racial classification, being neither fish nor fowl in the eyes of government. Yet, I never shared Ntinis loneliness, nor my colleagues sense of non-recognition. Why?

Credit, in the first instance, must go to my parents who had the foresight to send me to a pioneering non-racial school in Swaziland when apartheid was at its zenith, and then to an international college in Wales that championed international understanding and whose stated mission is to make education a force to unite people, nations and cultures for peace and a sustainable future. These formative experiences stood me in good stead. But more than this, I subsequently embraced, challenged and immersed myself in the dominant cultures I encountered. I sought to understand and compete on my own terms. I never felt less than I am.

I rejected oppression. I rejected being rescued. I rejected victimhood. And yes, the paradox of my experience under apartheid and other dominant polities and the impact of my formative education courtesy of the schools I attended and the example of my parents resistance of, and refusal to, accept apartheid emboldened this rejection.

The tragedy is that a black government in our country has failed, over more than a quarter of a century, to provide a sound education to the majority of its (black) people. It has failed to dignify their lives in the provision of housing and services to allow them to compete on an inclusive basis. Instead, it panders to a failed narrative and engages in tit-for-tat racism to justify its failures, which it lays at the door of others.

I recount this to illustrate both the reality of feeling Othered and the importance of not allowing yourself to be Othered. While I acknowledge my experience in this regard and understand that this may not be shared by many, I believe that this understanding needs to be internalised universally if we are to have any hope of celebrating our differences, in a society where we the people includes all people. Of necessity, this requires standing up against transgressions of fundamental human rights and not manufactured rights that serve no edifying purpose everywhere. More, it necessitates, in that defence, an engagement of both the victim and the oppressor.

Within this context, an interrogation of the BLM organisation that seeks to champion aspects of this cause is necessary. BLM calls for, as a cornerstone of their demands, the curtailing of property rights, the cutting of military budgets in half, the defunding of the police, the disbanding of private schools, the abolition of private hospitals, the creation of government-funded sacred sites for black worship and extra tax rebates depending on how black you are.

The kernel of truth embedded in the original focus and reaction that has in its genesis a case and a concern that is pertinent and merits attention has come to be hijacked, aggressively funded and sloganised beyond its original purpose and intent.

It is necessary therefore to guard against those who use ostensibly noble causes for their own material gain at the expense of the very people they seek to champion and who are perversely incentivised to do so. Behind their angry masks there often lies a cold dismissal of the nobility of racial reconciliation and an agenda that seeks to milk a grievance for eternity for the benefit of an elite as grievances are moulded, part of an echo chamber of the past. Once racist, always racist and the institutions bear witness, is the false mantra.

Opposing this is not minimising racism. It involves maximising reconciliation and responsible redress. It means refusing to bend the knee in the service of an agenda that is patently in the service of certain puppet masters. It involves a commitment to build a just society regardless of race, religion, circumstance of birth, sexual orientation and more. It is necessary to beware that when fighting monsters, you do not become a monster, as Nietzsche famously said, for when you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes at you. DM

Ghaleb Cachalia is an MP in the National Assembly and the DA spokesman on Public Enterprises and serves on the Ethics Committee in Parliament.

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Covid-19 Is ChangIng The Way People Think About Cannabis – Green Entrepreneur

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August 27, 2020 9 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

As a rabbi who works in the cannabis industry, Im considered safe.Neighbors, friends, even fellow clergy approach me with questions and requests: How do I join the program?Does cannabis help with [fill-in-the-blank]?Do you have any samples?The questions vary, but the conversations usually end the same way:

Rabbi, please keep this between us.

Of course, I respond, Your secret is safe with me!

But inside, I know that keeping quiet about cannabis is ultimately dangerous.Secrecy perpetuates the stigma and shame that have for too long accompanied cannabis in American culture. Butin the Age of COVID-19, secrecy may no longer be necessary.

Related:We Need to Clear the Smoke About Cannabis in the Workplace

In early March 2020, as the Coronavirus spread across the country and cities were plunged into quarantine, Americas reliance on cannabis became undeniable. Legal dispensaries were beset with long lines andrecord-breaking sales, asthe public feared that stores would soon be forced to closed. Relief set in when 27 states enacted stay-at-home orders that allowed access to cannabis in some form. Twenty-three states would deem cannabis as essential as bread and milk. Almost overnight, COVID-19 made clear whatindustry insiders, patients, and woke medical professionals had long known: Cannabis is essential to the healthcare and self-care of millions of Americans.It was a revolutionary moment that was a long time in the making.

Opinions about cannabis have been rapidly evolving since the mid-1990s, when California became the first state to legalize the medical use and sale of cannabis.Since then, cannabis has been on a steady track toward mainstream acceptance. In 2017, the Washington Post reported that more than half of U.S. adults had tried cannabis at least once in their lives, and a 2019 Pew Research poll revealed that 91 percent support the legalization of cannabis in some form.

Related:Is Cannabis Recession-Proof? COVID-19 Puts The Theory To The Test

Today, nearly a quarter-million Americans make their living working full-time in the cannabis industry.Thats more people than work in U.S. steel, iron and coal combined!While these numbers are astonishing, they dont tell the whole story.Despite the value that Americans place on cannabis, not a single health insurance company provides coverage for cannabis-related medical expenses. Only a handful of medical schools educate their students in its use.Cannabis remains a Schedule 1 Drug in the eyes of the Federal Government (on the same level as heroin), with no accepted medical use.Even more humbling, in 2018, 40 percent of U.S. drug arrests were for cannabis-related offensesmostly possession.A 2020 analysis by the American Civil Liberties Unionconcludedthat black people were nearly four times more likely than whites to be arrested, and in some states six, eight, or almost ten times more likely to be arrested.

This is the paradox of cannabis in America.

In recent months, as state after state hosted press conferences declaring cannabis essential, users across the country rejoiced, but most did so quietlythe result of nearly a century of anti-cannabis laws and propaganda.Cannabis may enjoy widespread public acceptance in the polls, but its use remains laden with stigma and shame.For many, cannabis is something to be kept hidden, out-of-sight of judgmental neighbors, concerned family members, and narrow-minded co-workers.

However, COVID-19 presents an opportunity to address this paradox head-on. Government-issued stay-at-home orders and self-quarantining practices have forced many of us into closer proximity. Cannabis users have had to upendlong-established practices for keeping cannabis use private.The smell of cannabis smoke emanating from a backyard patio or seeping out from an upstairs closet has forced many families (and neighbors) to have difficult conversations, which some have spent years avoiding.Quite a few cannabis users have reached out to me to discuss these tensions.The questions I hear the most: If cannabis is an essential medicine, why am I vaping it in my basement bathroom?And why am I so scared to admit I use it?Is it OK to hide from my own family?

What happens when self-care and well-being through cannabis are suddenly a conversation that we must have with our loved ones because were sharing the same living space?And how do we handle the guilt and shame that can accompany cannabis use? Because I'mboth a Rabbi and the Director of National Outreach for a national cannabis company, people ask methese questions all the time.

First, lets differentiate between guilt and shame, which are too often used interchangeably. Guilt is the sense that ouractionsare problematic shame is the belief thatweare problematic.The impact of feeling guilt vs. shame is also distinct. While guilt can be a stimulus for human development and self-improvement, shame is more often stifling and destructive.In other words, you can bemotivatedby guilt andparalyzedby shame.

In many religions, guilt is a component of spiritual practice.Shame, on the other hand, is not. A2019 studyby the American Psychological Association explained that guilt made individuals feel remorse, tension or regret. While shame left them feeling small, worthless or powerless.Guilt is an acknowledgment that we do better.Shame stops us from even trying.The time has come to extricate shame from cannabis.

If shame thrives in secrecy and darkness, then the antidote is bringing our cannabis use into the light. Of course, not everyone is free to share their cannabis story.Many reside in states where cannabis remains illegal, and others risk losing a job if the news came out.But for those of us able to have the conversation, it is crucial that we do.

Talking about cannabis can leave us feeling vulnerable, frustrated and defensive, especially when faced with harsh judgment.Take a few deep breaths and remember that most Americans have been taught since grade school that cannabis is a dangerous, illicit drug with no redeeming qualities.Approach your conversations from a place of compassion and empathy.Remember to be as real and honest as possible.

Here are some tips that I hope you find helpful:

Myth #1: Cannabis is a crime.

Fact:Thirty-threestates and the District of Columbia allow cannabis in some form.While the federal government has been slow to reclassify cannabis, Congress has passed the Rohrabacher-Farr Amendment ensuring state cannabis laws are respected.Stay safe by learning about cannabis laws in your state(check out the Marijuana Policy Project at mpp.org for more info).

Myth #2: Cannabis users just want to get high.

Fact: Not every cannabis product aims to get you high. In fact, many products dont even contain the chemical responsible for the feeling of being high (THC).The industry is moving toward micro-dosing of cannabis, where users take a small dose of THC (2.5mg or less) that does not have noticeable psychoactive effects. It is also important to recognize that the chemical responsible for the cannabis high (THC), is critical to alleviating pain and increasing appetite (important for people on chemotherapy or even, COVID-19).Want to go even deeper?Explore what makes your loved one so opposed to feeling good (or high) from cannabis. Do they feel the same way about a glass of wine?

Myth #3: Medical cannabis is just an excuse to legalize pot.

Fact: Just because medical cannabis opened the door to full legalization, does not mean it is a farce!Remember, lots of meds can be recreational and still legitimate(ex. ketamine, opioids/morphine, barbiturates, etc).

Myth #4: Cannabis is dangerous.

Fact:Despite what the DARE officer told you in school, cannabis does not kill brain cells.Recent studiespoint to cannabis having neuroprotective properties.Consider that the federal government owns one of the only patents on cannabis, Patent #US6630507B1: Cannabis as a Neuroprotectant (meaning it works toprotectbrain cells from harm).

Dr. Gupta covers his evolution regarding the therapeutic use of cannabis.Afterward, share your thoughts and experiences on how using cannabis has helped you and your loved ones.

This isnt about winning a debate.Frame your conversation by stating that you dont want to hide from the ones you love the most and that you hope this conversation brings you closer.Keep this in mind before you get into a fight about statistics or over something your mom heard from a friend. Return to this loving intention if you become frustrated or emotionally triggered.

In her writing about National Geographic Magazines racist past, award-winning journalist Michele Norris, commented: Its hard for an individualor a countryto evolve past discomfort if the source of the anxiety is only discussed in hushed tones.COVID-19 has laid bare the absurd paradox of cannabis in 2020 America and has given us the time needed to turn our kitchen tables into places of dialogue.If cannabis is essential to our health and wellness, its time we share our stories. Let us no longer be shamed into silence. Today more than ever, our voices are needed. Together, we can accomplish so much.

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Why the COVID-19 Pandemic Might Actually Be Helping Your Dating Life – AskMen

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It Only Took a Major Health Crisis for People to Focus on Lasting Relationships

In an effort to stay busy amidst a global pandemic, many of us have resorted to something thats always within arms reach: our cell phones. And in between celebrity stalking, Twitter scrolling, and eye-straining FaceTimes, the act of swiping on dating apps has filled the void left by this ongoing period of social distancing.

Many of these platforms have kept up with the times, updating their systems to support video chatting while encouraging new and safe ways to find your match without jeopardizing your health in the process. While the last few months have left many skeptical that theyll ever find the one amidst a major health crisis, in actuality, COVID-19 has ultimately helped to pump the brakes on the act of serial dating.

RELATED:A Guide to Dating and Finding Love During COVID-19 Times

While hookups are still possible, those who are used to moving from partner to partner can now takethe time to slow their roll and reconsider their approach in this new, unprecedented state of the world were in. As for those who are regulars in the dating game, they can use this situation as an opportunity to weed out the good ones from the anti-maskers. Now is as good a time as any to put building a connection (albeit, virtually)at the forefront, especially as one-time in-person flings take a brief chill on the back burner.

So how does one really take advantage of dating in the age of coronavirus? Well, well let the experts take it from here.

Theres nothing wrong with a steamy fling, but right now, people arent super interested in risking their health for something that doesnt allow for much connection. Instead of prioritizing pleasure, those still interested in dating are shifting their focus from straightforward sex tosome form of relationshipthat hasthe potential to blossom into something more.

The pandemic is a paradigm shift for those men whove mainly sought hook-ups, says Connell Barrett, a dating coach with The League and founder of DatingTransformation.com. Since easy sex is not so easy anymore, guys must connect in a deeper, more generous, high-level way. That sort of deeper connection takes true vulnerability. I call this getting emotionally naked. Men are getting more emotionally naked with potential partners because theyre not getting physically naked with them. This is welcome progress and growth for guys.

With this new form of dating, as cheesy as it might sound, you have the time to truly know someoneon a level you might not see otherwise. Theres a level of increased awareness about who you match with, who you open up to, and who you potentially meet up with for a socially distanced outing.

[The pandemic]has encouraged men and women to know what they are looking for and not just focus on sex as the main goal, notes dating coach Tripp Kramer. If people want to still hook up, they will, even through the pandemic. But this new way of dating has encouraged everyone to slow down and think about the person they are really talking to. I believe its bringing more awareness to dating which is a great thing overall.

Video chat dates are all the rage nowadays, and if you havent partaken in one yet, youre missing out on something clinical psychologist Joshua Klapow, Ph.D. calls a powerful pre-date tool.

Video chatting gives you a chance to see if there is a connection, to test your communication compatibility, and to look at the other person to see if you are attracted to them and vice versa, he says. They are a great way to test the waters in a now socially appropriate manner because of the pandemic.

If youre someone who says they love in-person first dates, youre lying to yourself. Not only do these virtual interactions subdue those nervous jitters youd feel if your knees awkwardly bumped together in a crowded bar, conversely, they allow for an easy end call escape if theres a quick realization that its just not meant to be.

With video chatting you get to see what they truly look like, sound like, what their mannerisms are, and even what their life looks like, all of which can influence compatibility, says Laurel House, eHarmonys relationship expert. Do they live in a cluttered mess while you are a neat freak? Do they have a collection of cats and you are allergic? Its matching with other people you are compatible with that increases your chances of having that connection go deeper and potentially become lasting and meaningful. I encourage daters to try online dating in places where real connections and compatibility are its core values.

And if youre someone who's been thriving in the virtual dating world, dont worry. Even post-pandemic, odds are this newfound approach to meeting other singles will stay put.

Video-dating is here to stay because its an effective screening process that saves time and effort not to mention money on pricey IRL dates, states Barrett. This is so much more effective than the pre-COVID model of online dating. You would swipe, match with someone, swap lots of text messages, get dressed up, and go meet them [just] to find out theres no spark. Thats a lot of time and effort for a disappointing date. Video dating makes the process more efficient and enjoyable. You can say, Hey, Im just not feeling it without leaving your couch. Video dating will long outlive the virus.

Even as restrictions loosen up across the country, that doesnt mean everyones automatically comfortable enough to venture to outdoor brunch for a date. There willstill be some who prefer the virtual approach, for the time being, focusing on the conversational aspect before approaching the physical one. With that said, a new and easy way to weed out potential partners is by being upfront about your stance on following COVID-19 guidelines.

If you care about your safety and the safety of others, the message from the scientists and health care providers is almost crystal clear: Avoid indoor gatherings of 10 or more people, wear a mask at all times unless you can be safely socially distant, socially distance at least six feet, and wash hands regularly, states Klapow. If you have any reservations about a potential dates safety protocols, you need to ask. A person who tells you it isnt important, it isnt real, or it doesn't really matter, is telling you a whole lot about themselves.

Just like in any other dating scenario, if you do agree to meet up in-person, communication and consent is key. The other person wont know your level of comfort and expectations unless you explicitly say them out loud. Sure, these questions may seem uncomfortable to ask, but wouldnt you say a positive COVID-19 test trumps that?

Are you comfortable shaking hands, hugging, kissing? Do you want to wear face masks, sit across from each other, sit outside? Conversation creates confidence, and you want to go into this date confidently, says House. Talking about these things before the meeting will minimize the pre-date stress of not knowing how to act, then cut out the potential initial awkward shake/hug/no-touch dance. Of course, follow any of your local CDC guidelines, but I see singles getting creative with in-person dates.

Theres no telling when well return to normalcy. Until a vaccine is readily available for the general public, chances are well be operating in a socially distant fashion for the long haul. That being said, we shouldnt dwell on the negative and wallow in the sadness of the situation. This pandemic has forced the world to slow down, and in turn, reassessday-to-day life. And what does that mean for those still hopeful that theyll find the one? Some really great things, actually.

Dating has quickly moved from a game to an opportunity to find real connections fast, notes House. Because we dont have as many social distractions or activities, we are focusing on what really matters in our lives, which for many of us is family, work, self-improvement, and finding love. With the focus on what matters, we are more emotionally invested as well, dedicating the time and energy to be present and on purpose.

Not only does Klapow agree, but he believes well see fewer dates that bomb and continue to bomb, courtesy of people being much better prepared for the first time they meet face-to-face. As much as the pandemic has limited interactions, it has forced those interactions to be more thoughtful, more intentional, and more deliberate.

Selectivity aint a bad thing, either. Standards are raised, the bar is high, and frankly, theres no reason to settle right now. Weve got all the time in the world, so use this as your opportunity to find that person that truly makes your heart skip a beat.

Weve become like bouncers at an elite club. Were more selective. Its harder to get past our door, says Barrett. As terrible as COVID-19 has been, raising our standards and refusing to settle is a good thing. Its a philosophy men should continue when were dating in a post-pandemic world.

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Why the COVID-19 Pandemic Might Actually Be Helping Your Dating Life - AskMen

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