Im telling this because its a major part of resilience. Social connectedness, anywhere you can find it, helps us get through these days with a more positive mental attitude. Its one step in the resiliency quotient.

I have looked at some resiliency research theres a panoply out there. It talks about making connections, seeing problems as not insurmountable (although, in fact, some are), accepting change as part of living, moving toward your goals, etc.

And I have read that since the COVID-19 pandemic, sales of self-help books have skyrocketed. Im not shocked about that. It makes sense.

But the bottom line is where to start? I think starting in whatever way you can with others is where it happens by phone, by video chat, in person with a smile under that mask, with a thank you for someone who might deliver something to your door.

Lately, I have been very interested in change how to make it, where to go. I have been impressed with the idea that small changes make a big impact.

Saying youre going to lose 50 pounds if you need to is awesome, but what about 5 pounds over the next month or two? If you do that, if you see progress, it helps to spur you on.

My spin: The same is true about social connectedness. The small steps you take today will undoubtedly reap big rewards tomorrow, for you and others. When youre done reading this, call or video chat someone you love or havent seen for years and years. I did this the other day when I called an old roommate from my medical school days in Chicago someone I hadnt talked to for 40 years. I found her phone number, dialed it, had a 2 hour conversation that made both of us smile and smile and smile. This was just as important to my well being as hitting the elliptical Its resiliency work. Stay safe and stay well.

This column provides general health information. Always consult your personal health care provider about concerns. No ongoing relationship of any sort is implied or offered by Dr. Paster to people submitting questions. Any opinions expressed by Dr. Paster in his columns are personal and are not meant to represent or reflect the views of SSM Health.

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Dr. Zorba Paster: Reaching out to others builds resiliency - Madison.com

New York National Guard soldiers, airmen and active duty and civilian medical providers fighting COVID-19 in New York City are getting the benefit of licks and a wagging tail to lift their spirits.The troops are returning the favor with belly rubs.The dogs are courtesy of Puppies Behind Bars, a New York City nonprofit organization that pairs inmates in regional prisons with puppies to be trained to become service dogs.The group brought the dogs to hotels where guardsmen and medical providers were staying, as well as the alternate care facility at the Jacob Javits Convention Center in Manhattan, to give those responding to COVID-19 a stress break, according to Gloria Gilbert Stoga, the program coordinator.Army Sgt. 1st Class Richard Masci, a New York Army National Guardsman assigned to the 104th Military Police battalion, first suggested the idea April 10 when he was talking to the unit's rear detachment."The National Guard was asked by Sergeant Masci in Kingston if they needed anything, and their answer was, 'Service dogs?' half in jest,"Stoga said."There's something about a dog that people love and they gravitate to and let their guard down,"Masci said.The idea was raised up to the governor's office, Stoga said, "and they recommended Puppies, so here we are.""As soon as we were asked, I said that of course we would help, and one week later [Friday, April 17], we started," Stoga continued.Puppies Behind Bars began in 1997 and has almost two dozen years of breeding and training experience to prepare dogs for service or therapy duties.It was a perfect fit for the current military missions in New York, Stoga said."The amount of stress that the military and medical personnel serving in New York City are going through is extraordinary,"Stoga said. "The fact that our dogs can provide some comfort makes me prouder than I think I have ever been of them."The dogs are raised and trained in seven different correctional facilities in upstate New York. About 140 prison inmates raise the service dogs and with support of the Puppies Behind Bars staff, train them for wounded veterans and first responders.To prepare them for the work, the dogs receive some 100,000 hours of socialization during their two years of training."We're set to do eight shifts a week, two hours each, and the idea is that this is a way for the young soldiers of the Guard to decompress, to just pet a dog and have a dog lick them and kiss them."The dogs live in prison with "puppy raisers,"inmates who are matched with them for the mutual benefit and bonding the training brings."Our dogs learn, instinctively, to help people who need them,"Stoga said.Stoga discovered that the efforts have reached further than the uniformed responders in New York."The Guard is also taking the dogs to meet with the nurses when they come back from the hospitals around the city, and what I've found out that I didn't know is that the nurses are literally coming from around the country,"Stoga said."They don't know anybody, they're working 12 or 20 hour shifts and they're coming back [to their hotels] and the National Guard is there with service dogs, and the nurses get to pet them and love them."The ability to hug and pet a dog during a time of social distancing is what makes the difference, said Army Capt. Yvette Valle, the headquarters detachment commander for the 104th Military Police Battalion."The experience here is quite surreal and unlike anything I've experienced in the military," she said.With the long hours and the stress of the unknown,the missions for soldiers during the pandemic has been unlike any other disaster response effort, Valle said."The biggest thing I promote within my company is a positive mental attitude during this crisis, and their attitude has been more than I expected with everyone willing to do whatever is needed,"Valle said.Bringing in the dogs has certainly made a difference."Coordinating the dogs has definitely boosted morale with the soldiers and with the nurses,"Valle said."It gives them a piece of family, a closeness that we can't experience due to social distancing,"Valle added. "They can get that through the dogs. It gives them love and warmth that they are sacrificing being here for this cause.""The dogs are doing amazing work out in the world and at this particular moment in time, are bringing a tiny bit of joy and normalcy to people for whom joy and normalcy seem almost impossible to remember,"Stoga said.The dogs, trained to work with veterans, wounded warriors and first responders, are a natural fit for supporting the National Guard response effort and can make a real difference for soldiers, said Army Maj. Gen. Ray Shields, the Adjutant General of New York's military forces."I am sure this means the world to all those who get to spend time with the puppies,"Shields continued."I went twice last week with two dogs," Stoga said. "One was raised in Fishkill and one in Bedford Hills."Serving as a stress relief, the visits are now a regular part of the working shifts for military and medical responders at the Javits Medical Station and hotels in Manhattan.Stoga spoke with one off-duty soldier during a visit on April 18, and asked where he was from."A small town in Dutchess County,"he replied, "Fishkill."Pointing to one of the dogs, Stoga said, "This dog was raised in the Fishkill Correctional Facility!"The soldier couldn't believe it, he got down on his knees to meet a new hometown friend, she added."It's been a great success,"Masci said. "Everybody is thrilled to see them.""For Puppies Behind Bars, all of our service dogs go to wounded war vets or first responders,"Stoga said, "So these dogs being able to help in this way before they are placed is just phenomenal. We're just thrilled to be able to work with the National Guard like this."(Army Col. Richard Goldenberg is assigned to the New York National Guard.)Related linksU.S. Army COVID-19 GuidanceArmy.mil: Worldwide NewsArmy.mil: National Guard NewsDefense.gov

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Puppies bring stress relief to those fighting COVID-19 - United States Army

Former Indian cricketer Subramaniam Badrinath, who is trying to help players to stay motivated, increase mental toughness, and reset their goals going forward with a new platform MFore, hailed former India skipper MS Dhonis mental toughness. Badrinath said Dhoni goes about his business as if 50,000 people are not watching him and also believes in his abilities. Also Read - Chennaiyin FC Player Anirudh Thapa Expresses His Admiration For MS Dhoni's 'Down to Earth' Attitude

He is not bothered about anything else. He completely believes that whatever he is doing is right. That is the approach everybody needs to have. I would like to say that just do what Dhoni is doing as a cricketer. He is totally detached from everything automatically. When he is going out there, going about the business, it feels as though the 50,000 people watching him are not there. He is alone, he knows clearly in his mind what he needs to do, and he goes about it, he said in an interview with The Indian Express. Also Read - Apart From 2011 WC Final, 2016 T20 WC Q/Fs vs Aus Second-Most Important Match: Virat Kohli

Badrinath also hailed off-spinner Ravichandran Ashwin as the most talented and mentally strong player in Tamil Nadu. Also Read - Please do Not Use This Bat: Matthew Hayden on MS Dhoni's Reaction to Mongoose Bat

In Tamil Nadu, I think its R Ashwin. He is phenomenal the way he is. The way he thinks about the game. He is talented, he is blessed with a lot of talent, but he is the one who knows his cricket inside out, he added.

The 39-year-old played 145 FC games and scored 10245 runs at an average of 54.5. It includes 32 centuries and 45 fifties.

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Its Like 50,000 People Watching Arent There: Subramanian Badrinath on MS Dhonis Mental Toughness - India.com

THE English adage attitude is everything holds true today just as it has done since time immemorial. Jeff Kelly further captures it so well by saying, Change your attitude and you change your life. Indeed, our generation today in times of the Covid-19 crisis can alter its life during and after this catastrophe by changing attitudes and thought process.

Robert Mandeya

It is no illusion that this disaster brought anger, denial, frustration, fear, uncertainty, anxiety and hopelessness upon us. This is indeed a sad situation which we have hopelessly watched as the crisis ripped into our investment of time, money, business, research, jobs and even lives.

Picking up the pieces

However, sulking or freaking over these misfortunes for hours, days and even weeks on end would not help anyone at this moment. It is time to let go of whatever heartbreaks pick the pieces and move forward in a new direction.

Easier said than done, of course, and it takes a great deal of effort, energy and power to pick yourself up and sail into a new direction all together. Believe me, in the course of this transition we are bound to make plenty of blunders and mistakes along the way but with the right frame of mind and enthusiasm coupled with appropriate actions you will soon attract positive results. This is only possible with a change of attitude a decision everyone in a situation of despair must make now!

Applying some life principles

Following certain life principles to develop and maintain a positive attitude will not only make you achieve some incredible breakthroughs but enable you to defy certain the odds in this period of devastating uncertainty.

I know from first-hand experience that the ideas I share in this article work have the power to literally transform your life! Please do not misunderstand me. I do not claim to be a know-it-all on this subject. Far from it!

I consider myself a work in progress and I continue to learn every day. However, I know what it is like to have a negative attitude, because that is the kind of attitude I had for the first 20 years of my life.

All of the positive changes that I have made in my life are the result of practicing the principles I will share in this and subsequent installments. The Master Action Plan, which I shared at the beginning of the Covid-19 lockdown, touched on three broad concepts: think, speak and act.

Success begins in the mind

Recovering from this crisis will surely depend on ones attitude and perspective of the environment around you. The power of attitude and belief to shape your destiny going forward will set you apart from the rest. Just recently, I had an interview with a friend, colleague and founder CE of the Astro Tech Group, Munyaradzi Gwatidzo, who spoke of psychological pivoting.

Basically, Gwatidzo was talking about how success depends squarely on the way that you think particularly in times of crisis. Attitude is the mental filter through which you experience the world. Some people see the world through the filter of optimism (the glass being half full) while others see life through a filter of pessimism (the glass being half empty).

The person with the positive attitude sees possibilities even when the chips are down. True to his word, Gwatidzo saw possibilities out of the current situation and he launched a product called e-shagi, a digital platform meant to ease peoples access to funding and business loans during and after this lockdown.

There is really not much we can do to control the circumstances facing us today but we can control our feelings and thoughts about this situation we are confronted with.

Attitude is like a window

Attitude is like a window through which we see the world. Just like any window, there comes a point where life starts throwing some dirt at our windows. The dirt may be thrown by very close people in our lives. This dirt might be in the form of criticism from our parents or teachers, ridicule from peers, rejection by those we love, disappointments in business or life, self-doubt in what we want to achieve and so on. This dirt keeps building up on our windows particularly if we choose not to do anything about it. In the end we will not see anything through that window.

By continuing to go through life with a filthy window, we lose our enthusiasm, get frustrated and depressed. And most tragically, we give up on our dreams all because we failed to clean our attitude window.

The Covid-19 crisis has literary thrown lots of dirt on our windows and the longer we take to clean it up the more we will not discern the possibilities out there in the midst of this crisis.

This is the road most of us find ourselves in at the moment. We are gripped in fear of the unknown and tangled in a web of uncertainty. The longer we stay in this conundrum, the filthier our windows get. We will not be able to see any possibilities. How could you see when your window is splattered with the mud of negativity?

Remember, crises provide a unique opportunity to refocus your energy, remap your entry back into business or work and to rebrand yourself. Mandeya is a certified executive leadership coach, corporate education trainer and management consultant. robert@lird.co.zw/ or info@lird.co.zw, Facebook: @lirdzim and Mobile/WhatsApp: +263719466925

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Attitude is everything: Rebooting from the coronavirus pandemic - Zimbabwe Independent

Stanbic IBTC Holdings Plc has urged Nigerians to maintain a strong mental attitude, which it stated is a major prerequisite for overcoming the global pandemic.

In a live video podcast on YouTube sponsored by Stanbic IBTC, the Blue Talk Show, Dr Sylvanus Jatto, a medical expert with the firm, said the lockdown offers the opportunity to reevaluate and restructure our daily routines, goals, and expectations. To relieve the psychological and mental concerns associated with the lockdown, he advised Nigerians to deliberately create a routine that enables them to go through what they have been doing before the lockdown and this routine could be spaced, to allow mental and physical relaxation. As a prerequisite for good mental health, he also advised Nigerians to exercise while staying at home and maintain a positive mindset, because this pandemic is but for a while.

Dr. Jatto further advised Nigerians to maintain a strong connection with their loved ones, even employers should consistently maintain communication with their employees, reassuring them of their commitment to their wellbeing. He further advised citizens to limit the amount of information being consumed especially from the social media space, as this information could affect them negatively.

On the economic impact of the Covid-19 pandemic, Jatto cautioned Nigerians to be financially prudent. During this period, Nigerians must be financially frugal in their spending, with much emphasis on priority rather than impulsive spending, to build resilience in this tough time, he said.

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Stanbic Advises on Positive Mental Health - THISDAY Newspapers

Motivation is volatile and not easy to sustain when cut adrift from the normal workplace. Photograph: iStock/Getty

Motivation is a slippery fish at the best of times. Its unbelievably fragile as anyone who has made and broken new year resolutions faster than the speed of light knows. But its also unbelievably powerful and can bring people through the most difficult circumstances.

One thing thats certain, however, is that motivation is volatile and not that easy to sustain when youre working remotely and cut adrift from the normal interaction of the workplace.

Motivation is a complex driver that governs our behaviour and this is underlined by the fact that it pops up as a factor across a number of disciplines, from management and organisational behaviour to social and educational psychology. It also plays a role in affective neuroscience and cognitive psychology, where academic Prof Kou Murayama, who heads the multidisciplinary motivation science lab at the University of Reading, says it has been normally treated as a nuisance factor that needs to be controlled.

Murayamas research is feeding into the emerging and stand-alone field of motivation science, which aims to take a multidisciplinary approach to understanding the different types of motivation and how they fit and function together to produce behaviour.

In his paper, The Science of Motivation (published by the American Psychological Society in 2018), Murayama points out that not all motivations are created equal and he also says that the use of competition a style often favoured by managers looking to improve performance doesnt work consistently as a means of increasing motivation.

Individuals differ when it comes to willpower and motivation but some people are called on to exercise both, to an extreme degree. Mark Pollock studied business and economics in Trinity College Dublin before losing his sight in 1998. Unwilling to be defined by what he couldnt do, Pollock, who was a competitive college rower, went on to win silver and bronze medals at the Commonwealth Games. He then threw himself into ultra-endurance sporting events and became the first blind athlete to race to the South Pole.

Pollock was subsequently asked to speak about his experiences to a corporate audience and one talk led to another. Over the last 10 years he has built a successful career on the international speaking circuit despite being paralysed in a fall in 2010. His TED talk about resolving the tension between acceptance and hope topped 1.5 million views within six months.

Pollock doesnt care for the term motivational speaker because he says gung-ho positivity is not his thing. Instead, he uses his own experience of coping with adversity to be thought provoking in a way that encourages people to take a step back, reflect and if necessary regroup.

Resilience and adapting to change are two of his main themes and he says what people need now is to regain their sense of proportion and control, as both have been thoroughly undermined by the pandemic.

Everything is suddenly on the table and people are constantly facing multiple choices which can be overwhelming, Pollock says. My advice is to narrow the focus of what youre trying to deal with. Resilience is about separating the internal and the external locus of controls and taking charge of what we can control we always have options.

Remote working has made it way more difficult to manage teams and keep everyone pulling together but Pollock believes its worth making a big effort to sustain team function because bringing people together is the best way to solve complex problems.

In this he speaks from the experience of having pulled teams together to take on extreme challenges, such as the race to the South Pole and running six marathons in seven days in the Gobi Desert. When individual endeavour is combined with others through collaboration, that is when major breakthroughs happen, says Pollock, whose personal quest is to help find a cure for paralysis in his lifetime.

Like many businesses, Pollocks was hugely affected by the coronavirus outbreak and, within a few days, all of his travelling engagements were cancelled. Almost overnight, he had to move online and he is now leading a series of 45-60 minute corporate webinars with co-host Paula Cunniffe, chief executive of Strive Management, covering topics such as resilience and motivation, coping with sudden change and unexpected challenges, charting some sort of a roadmap through the current uncertainty and dealing with fear and anxiety.

Pollock describes himself as a realist not an optimist and as someone who is at ease with the mindset of the ancient Greek Stoic philosophers. He has also been influenced by the Austrian neurologist and Holocaust survivor, Victor Frankl and by US vice admiral and Vietnam War veteran James Stockdale, after whom the paradox (why confronting reality is vital to success) is named.

Optimists rely on a positive mental attitude based on hope. Realists try to balance the tension between acceptance and hope, says Pollock, who is the co-founder of the global running series Run in the Dark and part of the World Economic Forums young global leadership programme.

Challenge is the opportunity and sometimes we choose our challenges and sometimes they choose us as were all experiencing right now. The starting point is to confront the facts and accept them and resilience starts from there. In a crisis, spectators sit on the sidelines while competitors show a willingness to pursue success at the risk of failure. The choice is ours.

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How to stay motivated while working from home - The Irish Times

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MUMBAI: The good looking young actor Mohsin Khan of Ye Ristha Kya Kehlata Hai dotes on his mother Mehzabin Khan. On being asked if he is the pampered one he says, I am the eldest son so I was pampered a lot. Also I was quite weak and shy as a child so I am sure my parents had to take extra care of me. I had Asthma and abba (Abdul Waheed Khan) and ammi (Mehzabin Khan) had to take care of me day and night. Now I am cured of asthama. He further adds, We are a big family. I am the most pampered person among all".

On being asked about lockdown he says, "I am doing what everyone is doing waiting for situation to get back to normal. I request all my fans to stay at home and follow the guidelines. This too shall pass away. Nothing is permanent"'.

Speaking further about his mother he says, " I contribute in helping in house hold chores in the time of lockdown but ammi tries her best not to let me do. Sometimes without our knowledge she does everything and sometimes me and my brother does the same. I feel blessed to have her as my mother. Every day is mothers day for me.

On being asked what he has learnt from his mother he says, To stay positive and have patience at all times. One must keep the right mental attitude towards everything and one must live life one day at a time.

Mohsin had made a cake for his mother last month on her birthday and his mother comes across as a very happy individual whenever she is seen with him and her smile is infectious enough and Mohsin has retained the same charm in his smile.

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Every day is Mothers Day for me: Mohsin Khan - Tellychakkar

What is a secure attachment style? Why is it important for caregivers to establish secure attachment bonds with children? How does secure attachment impact childrens psycho-emotional development? What are some signs of attachment security in a partner? Insights on how we can develop it, and how we can teach it to our children?

What is the most simple definition of a healthy or secure attachment style?

Attachment security is a set of deeply held expectations that the world is a mostly safe place to explore, and when its not safe, people can be counted on for support and help to cope.

Why is it so important for caregivers to establish secure attachment with their children?

The longer we feel safe when were young, the more time we have to develop. As human beings, our greatest strength and our greatest vulnerability is our extraordinarily powerful brains. Our brains are so big and powerful that we need years, if not decades, after being born to fully develop our minds. While there are some caveats and exceptions, it is generally true that with more time, freedom, and safety allotted to us, we are more likely to develop more flexible, resourceful, and lovable versions of ourselves.

How does secure attachment impact childrens psycho-emotional development?

Attachment security at the age of one year, has been associated with so many positive outcomes later in life that it would be impossible to summarize them in a brief answer. But there is a fascinating aspect of socio-emotional development that Id like to emphasize here.

Our brains are amazingly adaptive, and this presents some confusion when thinking about attachment security. The earlier a vulnerable child is exposed to real danger, the quicker that child will develop extraordinary adaptations to survive typically a hypervigilant, self-reliant relationship to the environment.

Some of the toughest and most rugged achievers in life come from early experiences of hardship. The problem is that early disruptions come at the cost of flexibility. Early disruptions, especially abuse and neglect, tend to result in adaptations that are more fixed and more desperately held on to.

Environments where emotion-regulation in parents creates a tense, intrusive, or less responsive environment, early adaptations are similarly rigid, but more focused on adapting to the parent than to the external environment. This type of adaptation typically leads to unhealthy codependency later in life.

Secure attachment allows for a more flexible shift between figuring out the parent, figuring out the environment, and the amazing benefits of completely self-absorbed play and exploration.

What are the most common signs that caregivers are securely attached with their children?

The most reliable marker of a secure attachment between parent and child is the overall ease and flow in the way the parent and child relate to each other. Does the child explore freely? Does the parent tense up, or watch vigilantly when the child explores? Does the parent trust the child? Does the child appear to trust the parent? Is the parent negligent, then punitive when the child finds trouble? If the parent is either anxious or overwhelmed, the relationship is less likely secure. If there is mutual trust, with the parent offering just the support the child needs no more, no less then the relationship is more likely to be secure.

Can you briefly contrast secure attachment with avoidant, anxious, and disorganized attachment styles?

The hallmark of attachment is flexibility in attention. Its natural for kids to get upset and cry when they get hurt, disappointed, or feel alone. A securely-attached child shows the full range of emotions fear, anger, sadness, joy, etc. but returns to a baseline emotional state once the child gets comfort from a parent.

The avoidant attachment pattern can be confusing because the child can seem well-adjusted and stoic, seemingly unaffected by a harsh environment. Internal physiology tells a different story namely that the child is under tremendous stress. The defining characteristics of avoidance in children is a detached, impassive response to environmental stress along with no attempt to seek comfort from a caregiver. In adulthood, this correlates with a dismissive attitude, a devaluation of relationships, and an attitude of not needing to rely on others.

An anxious-resistant, or anxious-preoccupied attachment pattern, is one in which the child is hyper-emotional under stress, seeks proximity to the caregiver, yet is neither soothed by the parents efforts to comfort the child, nor welcoming of the parents attempts to reassure the child. In adults this attachment pattern maps onto pathological dependency, where the person cant get over an angry preoccupation with the parent, or remains in a defiantly passive state.

Disorganized behavior is harder to describe, because its defined by the lack of a clear strategy of regulating attachment-related distress. Insecure-avoidant and insecure ambivalent-patterns may not be optimal, but they are still coherent patterns. Disorganization can take many forms, like an uncoordinated crashing into a parent, or falling into a dissociated, sleep-like trance. Theoretically, the disorganized attachment pattern, identified and described by Mary Main, as being an individualized response to fright without a solution. That is, the caregiver is the cause of the distress and thus inaccessible as a source of comfort.

What are some of the main consequences for children who are not securely attached with their caregivers?

I often think of development being like research its exploratory, built upon curiosity, and requiring tightly controlled conditions. Attachment insecurity is like trying to do this research in highly inhospitable conditions, like reading a textbook in a nightclub, or trying to conduct a rigorous chemical experiment in the back of a moving garbage truck. Can it be done well? Sureespecially with abundant innate intelligence. Is it likely to turn out well? Probably not.

The negative consequences of distracted development could be just about anything throughout the lifespan, including addiction, cancer, broken bones, depression, chronic mental illness, anxiety, diabetes, attention-deficit disorder, and any other physical or psychosocial impairment. Of course, I am speaking in terms of probability. A child who is insecurely attached could have many or none of these issues.

What are some signs that an adult partner has a secure attachment style in a relationship?

The way attachment patterns are assessed, whether by the Strange Situation Paradigm in childhood, or by the Adult Attachment Interview in adulthood, is by stressing the attachment system. So in relationships, signs of security and insecurity are most apparent in times of conflict. One sign of insecurity is extreme anxiety and rage thats not easily soothed, particularly around abandonment fears. On the other side of the spectrum, insecurity can take the form of a cold, detached, distance that is likely to evoke uncharacteristically strong abandonment fears in you, the partner.

Security can be thought of as the Goldilocks zone in between these extremes. A secure individual has moments of intense emotions and/or emotional remoteness. However, security is marked by an ability to move out of these states without too much time and destructiveness when attempts are made to repair a rupture in the relationship. Most of the time, the secure individual is better able to modulate emotions, meaning the hot emotionality is not scalding hot, and the cool withdrawals are not sub-zero chills.

The most common among dysfunctional dynamics are when an individual pursues redemption from childhood emotional damage by trying to thaw an icy, dismissive partner, or when one member of a couple attempts to heal early wounds by trying to cool down a partner who frequently boils over.

Extremely hot-tempered (usually, borderline personality organization) and the reciprocal cold-blooded personality types (often narcissistic) love to find each other for precisely these reasons.

What is the best way to develop secure attachment if you didnt receive it as a child?

Finding the right therapist is the best way I know. The therapeutic alliance is one of the most robust predictors of change in psychotherapy research. While its probably reductionistic to consider a therapist simply a more reliable attachment figure, forming an open, trusting, and meaningful relationship with a benevolent expert certainly can help promote a secure internal working model.

However, finding healthier relationships than the ones that are familiar, can help move a person in the direction of security. One key marker of resilience is the capacity to find mentors, friends, teachers, clergy members, etc. who can help a person have corrective emotional experiences. Anyone, whether classified as secure or insecure, can become more secure with relationships that provide support while increasing/maintaining feelings of autonomy and self-reliance, can help increase our feelings of wellbeing, reduce anxiety, and promote personal growth in a multiplicity of domains of life.

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What is secure attachment? - Thrive Global

He watched, supported, and cheered as Tagovailoa set the college football world on fire in 2018. Hurts never pouted, and his patience paid off when he rallied the Tide to a win over Georgia in the SEC title game after Tagovailoa was injured.

Hurts left Tuscaloosa after that season and landed in Norman, Okla., as a graduate transfer, hoping to lead Lincoln Rileys high-flying Sooner offense. He had big shoes to fill as the previous two Oklahoma starting QBs, Baker Mayfield and Kyler Murray, had been drafted No. 1 overall.

Hurts was impressive from the moment he stepped on campus, powering the Sooners to the BCS playoffs his fourth straight trip and finishing second in the Heisman race to LSUs Joe Burrow.

I think being able to adjust, continuing to adjust, and adjust to the differences where Coach Riley presents himself and how he teaches his stuff, said Hurts, who was quickly named one of the teams four captains. It was very different from what I was used to, so the biggest deal for me, I didnt know Coach Riley, but I was there for 11 months. So, trusting him, trusting his system, watching film of those past two guys, and just trying to put myself in the best situation to educate. I think we made a lot of explosive plays on offense, presented the defenses with different fits with the ability to run the ball from the quarterback position. I know it was very lethal.

Through the ups and downs of the last four years, Hurtss confidence never wavered. Instead, he channeled the adversity into strength.

All of it made me better. All of it has made me stronger, a better man, a wiser man. A better leader, said Hurts. Again, in two programs, its tough. To having to adjust to different players and just being respected to where every team Ive been on has followed me regardless of the position of where I came from I dont go into any place trying to be something Im not, force it, say, Hey, yall got to follow me It doesnt work like that. Especially in this business Im about to get into. Im a grown man. I can just be the best version of myself, working hard, being who I am. I think real recognizes real. Ive got that effect sometimes, and they follow me.

Hurtss attitude, leadership, and mental toughness are reasons the Patriots could be tempted to take a chance on him to compete for their quarterback vacancy.

In addition, he has excellent physical skills.

Hurtss production during college read like video game numbers, including 9,477 passing yards and 80 touchdowns to go along with 3,274 rushing yards and 43 TDs.

While some had suggested the 6-foot-1-inch, 222-pounder might be better suited to play running back or receiver in the NFL, Hurts showed during the combine that his future is at quarterback.

Watching Hurts throw during the drills in Indianapolis, he looked confident with his footwork and threw the ball with decent accuracy and impressive distance. He clearly favored throwing to his right, but with some coaching and work, that will improve.

Comparisons to New Orleanss jack-of-all-trades QB Taysom Hill are logical because both players have special skill sets that allow them to be productive from a variety of spots.

Having Hurts in Foxborough could be a win-win, as he would not only push Jarrett Stidham and Brian Hoyer for the starters job, he could also boost the offense by appearing in specialty packages designed by Josh McDaniels.

Jim McBride can be reached at james.mcbride@globe.com. Follow him on Twitter @globejimmcbride.

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NFL Draft: Why Oklahomas Jalen Hurts is an intriguing quarterback option for the Patriots - The Boston Globe

It took the coordinated effort of multiple embassies, two plane rides and a 16-hour layover in Helsinki for Thomas Dennerby to get home.

The repatriation flight on March 31 needed the involvement of the embassies of Sweden, Finland and other Baltic states, according to Dennerby, the coach of the India under-17 womens football team that was supposed to debut in the age-specific World Cup at home in November. The meet stands postponed due to the covid-19 pandemic and Fifa has not yet announced the new dates.

During these times everyones families need them as much as they need their families. It is important to be home. The current crisis allows everyone to see life from a larger perspective, said the Swede in an interview over e-mail. From Goa, Dennerby, 60, said he flew to Helsinki and then to Stockholm after a long stopover. The flying time from Goa to Helsinki is 16 hours. The arrangements were fine and we flew safe, he said.

The break is nothing to be worried about. Under the current situation, human lives are priority and it was natural that all footballing activities would be postponed, said Dennerby, who was appointed in November, 2019 after a stint with Nigeria whom he took to the 2019 Womens World Cup and made them African champions in 2018.

The 32 players in the preparatory camp were on a break since March 13 and were scheduled to resume training on April 1. Had plans not been mothballed they would have been in Europe this month. Most likely we would have been playing a tournament in Slovenia (in April) and maybe also in Italy (in May), Dennerby, a former midfielder with Stockholms Hammarby IF, said.

We have been working hard in camps (in Goa) but the real test is when you get to play quality opponents.

On return from Europe, the squad would have trained in Goa with specific focus on tactics. The camps in Goa were to be tough and they were to be backed by matches against tougher international opponents. This is the World Cup and we need to be merciless.

Dennerby said the players improved rapidly at first but the pace slowed as they got better. When you get better again its tougher to take the next few steps. We would have been ready in November anyway (but) the extra time (due to the deferment) could be an advantage.

Especially since mental strength is a work in progress for the team, said Dennerby.

Our search is on for mentally tough characters who can be super confident in front of so many spectators. You cannot develop than in an instant. Rather, we have been propagating it through our training regimes and off the field. The girls are getting to that level, they are getting closer, he said.

Coaches and athletes across disciplines have spoken of the forced break leading to a dip in fitness levels but Dennerby isnt throwing his weight behind that lot. I am not worried at all. The girls have been given individual programmes. Their attitude has been fantastic. I get their numbers (data) on my laptop and mobile phone. They are doing really good. Fitness-wise there wont be any dip at all, he said.

Asking India to be safe, practice hygiene and social distancing, Dennerby said it is important to stay positive now.

Sweden has taken a different approach. You can go to the bars or restaurants but you need to maintain social distancing, he said. He is doing that in a country that is not shut down.

A BBC report said Stockholm night clubs were open and people allowed leave homes after a long winter. However, many are remote working and that there has been a 50% drop in passengers in public transport.

Even though it was Easter, we did not go to visit relatives and friends. We just went to the supermarket to get what we needed. Everyone is waiting for normal life to restart, said Dennerby, who coached Sweden to a third-place finish in the 2011 Womens World Cup. We cannot see anyone around. Its a bit boring but its more important to be safe and help others not to get infected. I look forward to come back to India and kick-off training once again, said Dennerby, who is currently with his wife in the municipality of Tyreso, some 25km from Stockholm.

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Break good to up the mental game, says India U-17 World Cup coach - Hindustan Times